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His response was instantaneous. His hands dropped from her, and he turned toward his computer, clearly done with the conversation, but she didn’t let him retreat. She stepped into him and clasped his face between her palms. His stillness warned her she was crossing an invisible line, but she didn’t back off.
“Talk to me,” she begged.
His eyes blazed with some emotion she couldn’t identify, but she didn’t care what it was because something was better than nothing.
“Roth?”
“I’ve said more to you than any person on the planet.”
Why that sent a pinprick of pain through her heart, she wasn’t sure.
“Did you ever trust me?”
“I did.”
Past tense. He didn’t trust her anymore. She ignored the urge to lash out and defend herself and rested her forehead on his. “Please, give me something.”
She wanted to push, demand, plead for answers. She was a writer, a researcher, a student of human nature. Why hadn’t she ever wondered what motivated him? His iron will wasn’t forged through war with her father—it started before that in a little town in Colorado. Something drove him to claw his way up to her father’s circles. He arrived confident, ambitious, defiant from the get go. Where did his work ethic, dogged determination, and thirst for vengeance come from? She had accepted him as he was without wondering what made him tick.
When he tugged her hands from his face, she bowed her head, so he wouldn’t see the pain his rejection caused. What had she expected? Even when he trusted her, he hadn’t shared, so why would he now when they were… what? Enemies? Fuck buddies? Uneasy allies?
She turned away to leave him to his work and set her aside as he had so many times before. She wasn’t prepared for him to haul her onto his lap. Her dress rode up as her knees sank onto the plush seat on either side of him.
“What are you…”
Her voice died out as he wrapped his arms around her and buried his face against her chest. She stared at the far wall as her heart fluttered.
He was a self-proclaimed monster. A ruthless, vindictive asshole that everyone warned her would turn on her, but… there was another side of him she had meticulously scrubbed from her memory that came flooding back. She pictured him stretched out on her queen-sized bed in her tiny apartment, reading her Minnie Hess books as she studied. How many times had she come back from class to find that he had dinner waiting?How did I get so lucky to have a husband like you?Her eyes shut on a rush of bittersweet tears.
She didn’t know what to believe. Roth could be heartless, but he allowed her to call Kaia to give her peace of mind. Wouldn’t a monster get rid of a weakness like a mother who threatened to expose him? Despite Kaia’s obvious misgivings about her son, Roth didn’t return her animosity, which is why she had never questioned their distant relationship. What terrible son would travel to Colorado and hire a nurse to care for his mother after an open-heart surgery?
There was nothing to suggest anything was amiss with Kaia. Then again, she hadn’t seen any red flags with Roth either. Like mother, like son? The only thing that truly struck her as odd about Kaia was her preference for living in extreme solitude and the fact that she didn’t have anyone to help her while she was recovering from heart surgery. Kaia had lived in that town for almost forty years, yet had no friends? What was the point of living there if she had no connection with the locals?
Should she believe Kaia or trust her gut, which had steered her wrong one too many times? She bit back a groan when she realized she was looking for a reason to discredit Kaia, despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary. The fact that she wanted to justify his behavior revealed how badly she was tangled in his web. Less than a week in, she was trying to make excuses for him. Part of it was her own pride and ego—she didn’t want to believe that she had been wrong about him. If she found a hole in Kaia’s story, then maybe Roth wasn’t crazy and there was a motive behind his despicable behavior.
She should be pressing her advantage to get answers, but she couldn’t bring herself to shatter the peace. Was it just yesterday that she'd been scared out of her wits when he came into the penthouse, and twenty-four hours later, she was cradling him to her breast? Scratch that. Less than four hours ago, she’d been promising bodily harm and now…
This was dangerous. A slippery slope she had been down before, but she couldn’t stop herself. How far was she willing to bend to believe Roth was the man she wanted him to be?
“What else did she say about me?” he murmured.
Her stomach soured. “Does it matter?”
He sat back, which forced her to perch on his thighs with her hands linked behind his neck. They regarded one another warily before he squeezed her waist, a demand to spill the rest of Kaia’s warnings about him. She hesitated. Why did she have the feeling if they continued down this road, it wouldn’t end well?
“Finish,” he ordered.
She thrust away her misgivings and took the plunge.
“She said you’ve always been cold, even as a child,” she said softly, as if that would make it easier for him to hear what his mother thought about him.
He didn’t react.
“I-Is it because you lost your dad when you were so young?”
His expression was so remote, his body so still. She massaged his neck, soothing and encouraging him to give her something.
“It’s ironic that my mother fears me when she made me into what I am.”
