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“I remember you saying she didn’t want to come to the States with you… which I’m guessing means you asked her?”
“I did.”
“But you didn’t love her?”
He sits up a little straighter, holding my body tight against his. “No… but she loved me. And before you accuse me of being big-headed, she told me that herself.”
“All the time?” I haven’t said the words myself yet, and I suddenly hate the thought of someone else dripping them into his ear.
“No. She only said it once, just before I left. She begged me to stay and told me she loved me.”
“It didn’t make you want to give up your plans?”
“Not at all. I’d accepted the job over here. I’d made up my mind and wasn’t going to change it. Sorry if that sounds ruthless, but I felt like she was playing games. She’d never mentioned love before, and it all seemed a bit contrived. It certainly made my departure a lot messier than it needed to be.”
“Why did you ask her to come with you if you didn’t love her?”
“It felt like the right thing to do at the time. I may have made it sound like I just abandoned her at the end, but it wasn’t like that. It wasn’t that simple. We’d been together for quite a long time, and I guess I felt obliged to ask her, out of loyalty, if nothing else. The thing was, she had family… parents, sisters, uncles, aunts… there were dozens of them, and I think I knew, deep down, she’d never leave them.”
“That was a risk, wasn’t it? What if she’d said ‘yes’?”
“Then I’d have brought her with me.”
“And fallen in love with her, eventually?”
“No. I don’t think love works that way. I think you either know, or you don’t… which is why I didn’t believe her when she blurted it out like she did.”
He leans in and kisses me, his lips skimming over mine in the gentlest of caresses.
“Is that it?” I murmur. “There’s nothing more to tell?”
“That’s everything. You’ve got nothing to fear from my past… I promise.” He gazes into my eyes and flexes his hips, making me gasp as I feel him deep inside me. I raise myself up, then sink down again, groaning as I cling to his shoulders and grind in to him.
“God… that’s good.”
I repeat my movements, over and over, harder and harder, while he holds on to me, supporting my every move. I want to see him better, though, and I want him to see me, too. So, without disconnecting us, I release his shoulders, and sensingthat I’ll have more control if I’m crouching, rather than kneeling, I adjust my legs, bringing them up and placing my feet flat on the mattress, my knees bent. He watches, tilting his head, as I lean back, resting my hands behind me, on his legs.
He gazes down at the place where we’re joined, shaking his head. “That looks incredible… you look incredible.” I’m about to move, but he puts his hands on my thighs, stopping me. “I’ve got this.” I hold still, and supporting himself on his arms, he raises his hips, impaling me.
It’s glorious, and as he increases the pace, I realize I don’t just want him to see me… I want him to see the real me. So, I balance on my left arm and bring the right one around in front, my fingers finding my swollen clitoris.
I’m a little nervous. What if he’s shocked? What if he thinks badly of me? It’s too late to go back, though, and I circle my middle finger over and around myself, my fears evidently unfounded as his eyes mist over slightly and he whispers, “Oh… fuck… yes…” under this breath.
He takes me deeper, slamming into me as I rub myself, abandoning my insecurities in favor of passion… of love.
It doesn’t take long before I feel my orgasm build, and as though he can feel it too, he takes me even harder, pushing me over the edge.
“Oh… yes!” I throw back my head, screaming his name. He keeps moving, unrelenting, and I clamp my legs together, struggling for control.
“No… let me see you.” He takes his weight on one arm, placing his other hand on my knee to part my legs, then holding them open as I ride out the waves of pleasure, breathing hard, until I’m spent, and I collapse onto my back, between his legs.
Without giving me a moment to recover, he slides out from under me and kneels up and over me, entering me afresh.
“Oh, Mac… please.”
“Please what?”
“Take me?”
