Page 26 of Mistaken Impression


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He smiles. “I’ll make it as tasteful as I can.”

I shake my head. “Bearing in mind that the apron has ‘Meal Master’ written all over it, that’s going to be a challenge.”

He chuckles. “Do you have any alternatives?”

“Like what?”

“Like putting principles first and quitting?” he says, raising his eyebrows.

“That’s not an option. I’ve grown accustomed to having at least two, and sometimes even three meals a day.”

“In which case, shall we get on?”

“Sure.”

I guess time is money for him, and I hand him the apron while I unbutton my shirt, shrugging it off, then look around for somewhere to put it in this virtually empty room. The chairs by the window are my only option and I saunter over, laying it across the back of one of them, and then return, putting on the apron.

“Do you mind if I do it up?” The photographer steps forward and I frown at him. He smiles, holding up his hands. “I need to make absolutely sure the logo appears in the centre and isn’t skewed by the way the apron is tied.”

“Oh… I see.”

I turn around and he takes his time, doing it up behind me, and then walks around in front, eyeing me closely, adjusting the strap around my neck by a fraction of an inch, and nodding his head.

“Okay. Let’s get started.”

“Where do you want me?”

He leads me over to the backdrop, setting the stool to one side. “We’re not gonna need that, after all,” he says, almost to himself, and I step to my left, keeping out of the way, while headjusts the position of the lights by a few inches in each case. “Okay… come stand over here.” He shifts to one side and I take his place, feeling self-conscious.

He moves behind the camera, looking through the view-finder, and then steps out again, coming up to me.

“Do you mind?” he says.

“Mind what?”

“If I move you around a little?”

“Not at all. Go ahead.”

He smiles and puts his hands on my shoulders, shifting me to my left and turning my body, so it’s at an angle to the camera.

Once he’s happy, he moves away again, returning to the other side of the tripod. “That’s better,” he murmurs and I hear the shutter click a few times. “Fold your arms across your chest,” he says, and I do as he says while he takes another few photographs. “You’ll like those. The logo is completely obscured.”

“Yeah… but that means Kennedy won’t use them.”

“Probably not, but she’s got the option. Okay… now… let’s try this…”

He steps aside, crouching down to a small bag, and pulls out a rolling pin, coming over and handing it to me.

“Are you sure this shouldn’t be a riding crop or a flogger?” I ask, and he laughs.

“We’ll get around to that later.” Once again, he manoeuvres me into position before getting back behind the camera. “Can you try looking masterful?”

“Masterful?”

“Yeah… like the name of the show.”

“I’ll try it.”

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