AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Behind me, Bear taps his drums and Carson straps on his guitar. I follow their lead and plug my bass back in.
Bear strikes his cymbals, which is my cue to start in on the opening chords ofUnder Pressure.Which I completely butcher, even though I’ve been playing this song since I was a kid.
Things don’t get any better after that. If I hadn’t played an almost perfect set before our break, people might not notice. But my screw-ups are obvious, as is Adam’s frustration. These shows are our dress rehearsals for the Jingle Ball. And since we don’t have much time to practice together in between them, they need to be good.
I’m just as frustrated with me as Adam is. I should be able to blow off Hope’s rejection, but it’s hit me hard. I don’t have any heart to put into these songs. I left it all on the curb when I told Hope I wasn’t giving up.
So do I keep my word? Or do I take what she’s telling me at face value and stay right here, firmly planted in the friend zone?
When we play the last song on our set, the crowd applauds, but not like they did after our first set. This applause is weak sauce. Just like my playing, so totally deserved.
The only good thing about my terrible performance is that I’ve killed the vibe and people leave quickly. If not for that, Adam would be even more annoyed with me.
But he wouldn’t be more annoyed than I am with myself. To add to that annoyance, my sister—who showed up half way through the show—is the only person who doesn’t leave.
As soon as Adam has locked the door, he walks straight toward the stage and me. “Dude, what was that? You know those songs.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I lost my groove.” I unplug my amp, waiting for Adam to really let me have it.
But he doesn’t say anything else. We all go about packing up our instruments in silence. Everyone else finishes quickly, but Bear and I take down the mics too. Evie and Carson go to the kitchen with Adam to get things cleaned up there while Stella and Britta put up chairs and sweep.
When we’re the last ones on stage, Bear asks in a quiet voice, “What was in the text that got into your head?”
I look at him ready to deny everything, but he raises an eyebrow. That’s all the warning I need to not try and hide it. Bear and I tell each other everything. He’ll know if I try to play off Hope’s text as no big deal—he already knows something’s up.
“Hope’s back,” I say with a sigh.
Bear knows how I feel about her. He’s the one I whined to most after she left.
“I heard.” He nods.
“She’s got a kid.”
“Heard that too.”
“Did you hear she came over to my house today too?”
He shakes his head. “To see you?”
Now it’s my turn to shake my head. “To meet Mom.”
“She brought her kid?” He winds the mic cord around his arm without taking his eyes off me.
“Yeah.” I do the same with the other mic.
“And?”
“And what?”
“You’re obviously still into her, but why? You’re not ready for kids. Is it because she’s not into you?” The innocent look in his eyes is a scam. He knows he’s baiting me.
“No…no…” I don’t think that’s it.
Maybe a little bit.
But that’s not all of it. I can’t put my finger on what it is that draws me to her—maybe because she’s fun. She’s beautiful. She makes me laugh. I don’t know for sure. I only know I’m not going to answer Bear’s question.
“You want to start things again; you’ve got to get to know the kid first.” He says this like it should have been obvious to me.
