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Jolting back into my body, I stared at Gunnar through the glass divider, all the other noise disappearing. Anguish was written all over his face as he looked at me, trying to give me the support he couldn’t physically share. It hit me then. This wasn’t a joke. This was my reality. My brother was gone—snuffed from the earth while I rotted in this godforsaken prison.
I swallowed. “Did he suffer, Gunnar? Tell me he didn’t fucking suffer.”
“It was quick, Nick.”
Knowing my brother wasn’t out there in the world anymore tightened my chest so much that I found it hard to breathe. Taking in a shallow breath through my mouth, I held Gunnar’s eyes. “When?Whendid this happen?”
“Four days ago.”
“Why the fuck did it take you so long to tell me?” I demanded, feeling finally starting to seep back into my limbs.
“You know why, Nick. It takes seventy-two hours to get a visitation slot.”
“And you couldn’t have called?” I demanded, slamming a palm against the cubicle desk.
Gunnar repositioned the receiver against his ear. “You wanted to hear this shit over the phone rather than in person?”
Fuck. No, I didn’t, but four fucking days? My brother had been wiped from the face of the planet four days ago, and I had no idea. I was in here, playing cards and shooting the shit with other criminals.
“Look, I’m sorry, Nick. Rixon thought you’d want to hear this in person.”
He was right. Hearing this news over the phone would’ve been torturous. But my torture didn’t end there.
Gunnar said, “His funeral is tomorrow.”
I croaked, “Tomorrow? No, Gunnar. I can’t apply and gain a furlough in time. Delay it!”
He shook his head, regret sitting heavily in his eyes like it was sitting on my shoulders. “I’m sorry?—”
I snapped, leaping to my feet. “I don’t need your fuckingsorrys!” I barked.
“Sobolev, this is your second warning,” a CO said behind me. “You won’t be getting a third.” Like I gave a fuck about that. My twin brother was dead. And I didn’t know until now. Rage began to fill me, running into the cracks in my heart that Dimitri’s loss had created in the short span of time it took for Gunnar to say,D is dead.
“Find the motherfucking cunt who did this, brother.Find himso that when I get out of here, I can take my time with him. Make him pay for taking my brother away from me like this.”
“Nick, man, calm the fuck down,” Gunnar implored.
“Swear it!” I roared into the phone. “Swear you’ve got my back. That you’ll be by my side.”
His wide-eyed gaze moved nervously around my face. “Jesus, fuck, Nick!”
“Swear. It.”
His throat bobbed. “I swear it, Nick. I promise.”
Before the echo of his words reached my ear, I pulled the phone from the wall and threw it across the other side of the room. My rage needed an outlet. It needed somewhere to go; otherwise, I was going to burn down this entire prison. My blood frothed with pure, unadulterated fury—an emotion I’d never experienced before.
The handset smashed into the wall near the CO’s head, making the bastard’s rage notch up. There was no way it matched mine, though.
Mutters of “What the fuck?”and “Shit just got interesting” abound as the two guards in the room rushed over, while the main door in and out of the visitation room slammed open. I couldn’t see them, though. All I saw was my rage. A weight latched on to my arm. Then the other. I had a CO on either side of me, wrestling me down to the table. I fought with everything I had in me to get back up again, snarling at the two men who couldn’t see that it was grief that was driving me berserk. I twisted my face toward the glass, seeing Gunnar mouthing the wordscalm downto me. But I couldn’t calm down.
Gunnar’s gaze shifted to something above my head.
And then…
Darkness.
Chapter 2
