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Kaash was lounging on the couch, nursing a beer, while Rixon was leaning casually against the bar as he spoke to the raven-haired woman who had loved my brother as much as I had. Her slightly uptilted eyes gave her an exotic look, and I knew from speaking to D during those early days that Isla’s dark eyes were what had drawn him in, but it was her heart that had happily held him hostage.
Standing behind her was another woman, her wide eyes darting around the clubhouse like she was afraid she’d catch a communicable disease if she stayed here too long. She was gripping the strap of her handbag, her tongue swiping over her lower lip. Nobody had noticed I was there yet, not until Lucifer’s claws clicked on the scuffed hardwood floor, alerting everyone to his presence… and mine.
Isla’s head twisted around, her watery gaze fixing first to my face before dropping to Lucifer. With a sob, she dropped to her haunches, and the mutt walked to her at an unhurried pace, wagging his tail slowly in greeting. She wrapped her arms around his muscular neck, buried her face against his short fur, and sobbed.
I shifted my weight, not sure what to do with this outward display of grief. “You can keep the damn mutt if you want,” I said, just wanting her to stop being so damned sad. Lucifer’s dark-brown eyes lifted to my face as a small whimper escaped him. Jesus Christ.
Pulling back and wiping the tears from her cheeks, Isla studied me with a penetrating gaze, and I knew without her having to tell me what she saw. She saw Dimitri. The same eyes.Same nose. Same lips. But I was not like my brother. She shook her head. “Dimi would’ve wanted you to have him. That’s why I left him here for you.”
As if this discussion about the custody of the damned dog was something Lucifer understood, he came and stood at my side again, one large paw on the top of my boot.
“He likes you.”
Brushing off the kind sentiment, I said, “He thinks I’m my brother. But I’m not.” Leaning into the dog’s muscular shoulder, I shifted him off my foot and took a step closer to the love of my brother’s life. “How are you holding up?”
She shrugged, more tears streaming down her cheek. By the way she wiped at them quickly, she hadn’t even realized she was crying again. “Like the other half of my soul is gone.”
Yeah, I knew how that felt.
“How long have you been out for?” she asked.
My shoulders tightened. “You want to go for a walk?” I asked, hoping like fuck she said no. I didn’t know what the fuck to do with my grief, let alone hers.
Isla gestured to the other woman with her. “I can’t leave Quinn by herself. I promised I wouldn’t.”
Quinn’s wide eyes flickered to my face briefly before dropping away.
“No harm will come to you here,” Rixon said to Quinn. “You’ll be safe inside the clubhouse.”
I’d forgotten he was even still in the room. That’s how shaken I was by seeing Isla.
“I can wait in the car,” Quinn said.
Chewing on her bottom lip, Isla turned the idea over in her head. “You wouldn’t mind?”
“Not at all.” She was turning and halfway across the room before I knew it. Being inside an MC clubhouse must have scared the fuck out of her. Isla followed behind her friend, and eventhough I told Lucifer to stay behind, the dog kept pace at my side.
Outside, the sun was bright, making me shield my eyes with my hand as I watched Quinn jump into the passenger seat of the Hummer that was parked nearby.
“You kept D’s car?”
Isla turned to me. “How did you know it was his?”
I shrugged. “He talked about getting one in one of his first letters he sent me.”
She nodded, looking pensive. “Why did you tell him to stop writing you?”
Rolling my shoulders, I tried to dispel the tightness between my shoulder blades. My skin felt like it was too tight for my body. Gesturing to the gate at the end of the driveway, we began walking, taking my time before saying, “He needed to focus on school.”
“He was worried about you.”
“I know.”
“He wanted to visit you every weekend. Why didn’t you add him to your list of approved visitors?”
My chest clenched, the regret singeing through my nerve endings. The truth was that I was a selfish prick. I didn’t want my brother to see me behind bars. I didn’t want to see the disappointment and shame in his eyes. “D was too good for that place.”
Isla stopped me with a hand on my forearm. “He wanted to support you.”
