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Chapter 32
Gigi stared down atherphone,tearsblurring her vision until her wallpaperscreen becameasmear of indiscerniblecolors. Shehad wanted totellMaxsheloved him,too,butthewordshadbecome stucktoher tongue,refusing toleaveit. She’dknownthattheir relationship had beenover the moment hedrove offin thecab,butstill, hearing itand acknowledging it madeitseem morereal.
Hehadn’tbeenwilling totrylong-distance,and shewasn’tsureshewantedto,butshe’d suggested it becauseifhehad beenwilling,shewould have given itherall. Sheknewthat you onlygotachanceataloveliketheirsoncein a lifetime,and walking awayfromitwasone of themostdifficultthingstodo. Butshehad to. So manytimesbefore,hermother had told her neverto passup herdreamsbecauseof aboy…
Except hewasn’taboy,washe?Hewasthefirstmantotake her seriously,toseeher for her. Had shejustmadethebiggestmistakeof her life?
“Wanttogo outand getdrunk,Borello?” Jen asked from her bedroom door.
Swiping atthetearsonhercheeks,Gigi looked at herroommate. “Umm,no,thanks.”
Jen’sbrowfurrowed.“Hey,what’sup?Something happen with lover boy?”
Thetearsshe had denied dripped fromhereyes,opening up thefloodgates.
“Whoa,hey,what’sup,girl?”Jen asked,wrapping herarmsaround Gigiand pulling her against herchest.
“It’sMax.He’sgoneand he’snotcoming back.”
“I thoughtyou wereokaywith himleaving.”
“I thoughtI was,”shereplied, “until heactuallyleft.”Pulling back,shelooked intoJen’sblue eyes.“HeaskedmetogotoCalifornia.”
“And you said…?”
“I said Icouldn’t.”
“Whythefucknot?”Jen blurted out.“Sorry.”
“I gota call from AMNH today. Imadethesecond-round acceptance. I gota position onthe internship program.”
Jen whistledthrough herteeth. “Congrats, Borello.”
“Thanks,”shemuttered,notfeeling atall excitedabouthernews.
“DoyouwanttoknowwhatI thinkyoushould do?”Jen asked her,holding Gigi atarm’slength.
“What?”
“I think you should forgetaboutMax. Hewasjustsomething fun foryou todowhilehewashere, butnow you havetogetserious. You graduateattheend ofthisyear. You needtogetthebest gradesyou can,and workhard atthemuseumtomakesure you getthejob. Youdon’tneed to worryabouta guy.”
Jen’slogicstrucka chord with Gigi. Whatshe’d saidwasall true.BeforeMax hadcomealong,Gigi had been focusedon herstudies, on getting theperfectjob and establishing hercareer. Somehow hehad distracted hercompletely. She’dskipped classesbecauseof him,butshewasgoingtostop thatnow. Pre-max, her priorityhadbeen school. Shewasgoingtomakeita priorityagainpost-Max.
“You knowwhat,Jen?You’reright. I just needto getthrough theend ofthisyearand makesureI getthejobattheAMNH.”
“Damn straight,” herroommateagreed. “Now,getdressed. We’re goingouttocelebrate your success.”
*
FinalsweekcameandwentforGigi.She’dpouredallhereffortsintostudyingbeforestartingwork atthemuseumoverthesummer.Althoughshewas spendingmoretimewithAlex,hedidn’ttryto makeanotherpassather.Infact,Alexmetanothergirlwhiletheywereworking—LisaWoowas fromYaleandthey’dimmediatelyhititoff.Gigihadbeeninvitedtogohavelunchwiththemon morethanoneoccasion.Afterthefirsttime,though,shepolitelydeclined;beingathird wheelwas toodepressing.
Theweekspassedquickly,untilfinallyitwasthe endofsummerandtheannouncementfor who wouldsecurethepermanentpositionat the museumwasonlydaysaway.Alexdidn’tthinkhe’d gottenit,but he wasalreadymakingplanstomovetoConnecticuttobeclosertoLisa.Gigialsowasn’t asconfidentas she’dbeen atthebeginningofthesummer.Allthepeople ontheinternshipwere smartandincrediblycompetitive.AfterMax,sheseemedtohavelostsomeofhermotivation and driveeventhough she’d tried reallyhard togetitback.
WithoutMax,herlifehaddrainedofcolor.WithoutMax,Gigihadlostsomeofherspirit.Jen constantlytoldhertostop moping,butGigithoughtshewasn’t—shewasjustlivingliketheloveof herlifewasacrossthe othersideof thecountry.Shehadn’tcalledhimsincetheday ofhisfather’s wake.Shewantedto,butshewasn’tsurewhatshewouldsay.Sometimesinhermoments of weakness,she’d blockhernumberand callhisphonejusttohearhis voice. On morethan one occasionhehadwhispered hernameintothephone,causinghertohangupabruptly.Itwasbetter thisway.
Shewonderedifhe’dmovedon.Shewonderedifhe’dtakenhiswifeback.Theyhadalong historytogether,andbecauseofErin,shethoughthemighthavetriedtomake itwork. Deepdown shehopedthatwasn’ttrue.
Sometimesshewould findherselflooking foranthropologyjobsin LosAngeles, oratleast California.She’dactuallyappliedforoneattheNaturalHistoryMuseum of Los Angelesbutknewit wasalong-shot.Theywantedsomeonewithactualexperience,notsomecollegegraduatestill wet behind the ears.
