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Tears sting my eyes, and I turn my head, pulling my hands away.
Frantically, he backs up. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“You didn’t upset me,” I say. I have a few weeks to months left. No matter how much I want to act like that doesn’t matter right now, I can’t. “I’m scared of hurting you.”
He pauses, looking anywhere but at me. “Margo?”
“Yes?”
He faces me again. The pupils of his eyes are dilated as if I’m the only thing he sees. “I’m going to hurt either way.” There’s a mixture of pain and longing written across his face. “But never being with you would hurt me more.”
Why does he have to look at me like this? It makes me want to give in to ease my fluttering heart.
He inches closer. “I don’t have to hurt right now.”
His stare makes me forget the truth for a moment. Would it really be so bad if I liked Daniel? I don’t have anything written next to my name on my list. What if I wrote Daniel’s name? Before I can stop myself, I lean in and leave a timid kiss on his lips, one barely lasting a second, and pull away again.
His fingers gingerly tap his lips with a soft smile.
I laugh, turning away.
This isn’t like the kisses I’ve seen Annie gush over. It isn’t a kiss that’s meant to curl your toes and send shivers down your back. But it is a kiss. My kiss. It’s my way of crossing the line first, letting Daniel know it’s okay. That he has my permission even though I shouldn’t give it to him.
CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE
DANIEL
Margo Blakely kissed me.
Her lips on mine.
I smile, trying to remember the feeling as long as I can.
My chest is ready to explode, pulse skyrocketing. I can’t look away from her big brown eyes. They’re like a hug to my soul, and I almost believe I matter. That I’m someone that deserves to be wanted.
Rain starts to pour, breaking our eye contact.
Without a care in the world, Margo tilts her head back, letting the raindrops fall across her face. She probably shouldn’t be out in the rain. What if it makes her sicker?
“Let’s go,” I say, tugging on her arm.
She shakes her head as she jumps up. “I’ve always wondered what it would be like to do this.” She spins in the rain, arms out, and her joy is contagious. She looks happy jumping and twirling around. She’s truly happy, and I can’t help but smile, admiring her, off to the side.
“Come on,” she says, waving me over. Then she runs up and grabs me, pulling me back to where she was.
“I don’t know what to do.” I’ve never once thought to myself,I should dance in the rain.
“Just have fun,” she says. She reaches her hands up, cupped together to catch water. She’s glowing. She’s beautiful.
I get the overwhelming urge to take her hand. I twirl her around, catching her when she spins back. I rest my hand on her waist. It’s shaking, and I hope she doesn’t notice. I can’t breathe as I smile down at her soaked bangs plastered to her face. I move them out of her eyes, trying to tuck them behind her ear even though it doesn’t do much since they’re so short.
I press my lips against hers, heart exploding in disbelief as I kiss her. There’s a fear in the back of my head saying she’ll pull away, but she doesn’t. She leans into me, and I can feel her smile as she kisses me back.
Rain pours down on us, but it doesn’t matter. We’re in our own little world where time stands still. I know there are eight billion people on this earth, but I’ve never been more sure that Margo Blakely was made for me.
Her lips are soft, and her hand travels up to the back of my neck, sending a shiver down my spine. I pull her closer, if that’s possible, because I want this moment to last forever. I kiss her like this is the only chance I’ll ever have. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but right now we’re together. It feels right.
When she finally pulls back, I wrap my arms around her. Her head rests against my chest, and I hold her there like she’s my missing puzzle piece. She fits so perfectly that I forget she can’t stay in my arms forever.
