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Chloe collapses on a bench next to the sixth hole. “But mermaids are fish on the bottom half. Fish don’t have vaginas.”
Maya huffs. “Do you not read any of the books I recommend?”
“What do books have to do with a mermaid having sex?” Paisley asks.
“Maya enjoys reading sexy books with sexy times in them,” Nova answers.
“Smut is the word I prefer.” Chloe stands. “But I still don’t get it.” She wobbles toward the sixth hole where a mermaid is lying on a rock.
“And I don’t get how she’s this drunk.”
“There isn’t a rule stating you can’t drink whenever you want,” Paisley explains.
“In other words,” Nova says. “Chloe drinks every time the loser drinks.”
“She thinks it shows off her golf skills if she wins while intoxicated. Golf skills?” Maya snorts. “We’re at a mermaid mini golf.”
“Look!” Chloe bangs her golf club against the mermaid. “There’s no hole.”
Nova sighs. “We’re going to get kicked out again.”
“We’ve never gotten kicked out. Although.” Paisley frowns. “We have been politely asked to leave before.”
I join Chloe at the sixth hole. “It’s not a real mermaid.”
“I have an idea.” Chloe raises her golf club in the air. “Let’s go find a real mermaid.”
“I’m in!” Maya declares.
“You do know your books are fictional, don’t you?”
“They’re fictional the way your love of Flynn is fi-fi-. You know the word I mean!”
I glance around at my friends. “Who hasn’t been drinking a shot at every hole?”
Paisley raises her hand. “I haven’t.”
“Come on.” Nova sways a bit but catches herself by using her golf club as a crutch. “Mermaid Mini Golf is boring if you’re sober.”
“And Buccaneer Whiskey is yummy,” Maya adds.
“Too bad the owner of the distillery is a buffoon,” Paisley grumbles.
“Who owns the distillery?” I asked. “I assumed it was some outsider.”
“Eli owns the distillery. And Paisley has a crush on him,” Maya sings.
“I do not have a crush on Eli. The man has no manners and doesn’t care who he hurts to get what he wants.”
“Oh! It’s an enemies-to-lovers romance. I love those!” Maya throws out her arms and twirls around in a circle. She hits the bench and crumples to the ground. “I’m okay! Nothing hurt!”
Chloe crawls over to her. “Why are you laying on the ground? I thought we were going mermaid hunting.”
Maya gasps. “We can’t hunt mermaids. They’re a protected species.”
“They’re a mythical species.” Paisley holds out her hand to Maya and helps her to her feet.
“They’re not mystical.”
