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“Griffel’s,” Eymaris repeated, as if she needed to speak it to remember it. She gave a long sigh. “I’ll go now and see if they have any. I simply cannot stand that flower tea.”
I bit back my smile. “Hurry, then, before they close. Remember—just two drops in the tea.”
“Two drops,” she repeated.
I watched her walk down the cobbled pathway, my lungs squeezing a little when she stumbled over a dislodged rock before she managed to catch herself. She went on her way, and I set out to the path, stamping down the rock and covering it with a heavy layer of soil to keep the edges close to the ground.
When I looked up at the sky, I saw night was approaching and fast. And so I went back inside the Healers’ Guild hall, made sure everything was in order in the front room before I left. The next healer scheduled would arrive in mere moments, and I had no more patients for the evening.
As I walked through Rolara at dusk, I admired the brightly lit shop windows, calmed by the thud of my boots on the paved roads, and took in the chatter from passing families and the laughter pouring through windows.
It had been my favorite time of day in the last two weeks, ever since I’d given Lorik the hive heart. The time where the world quieted, people returned to their families, shops closed their doors, and warm light illuminated the darkening streets.
“Good evening, Marion,” called a familiar voice. Gwilor, an older Kylorr male who I had treated at the guild hall the week prior.
“Evening,” I greeted back as we passed, giving him a small smile.
Another called out to me toward the end of the street. Winnand, an Allavari-Ernitian female, with thick, long blue hair and yellow eyes. She was a baker of Ernitian delicacies and had sliced her hand open on a sharp knife a few days ago.
“How’s it healing?” I asked as we passed.
She held up her palm, flashing me a smile. It hadn’t quite deep been enough to require stitching, but I was pleased with the progress.
“Almost back to normal!” she reported. “I’ll drop off some pastries at the guild hall for you tomorrow. The ones I told you about.”
“I’m looking forward to it,” I told her. I smiled and waved her off, my strides a little more upbeat. Even as I passed Grimstone’s Tavern tonight, laughter and conversation filtering from the windows, it didn’t dampen my mood.
My footsteps hushed as I stepped on the dirt-lined path of Market Row, where I sold my goods every month, and then the Black Veil loomed before me. For once, it didn’t seem like a relief to enter its shadowed depths. For once, I wondered if I should go back to Grimstone’s, order a goblet of wine after the day, sit in a back booth, andnotthink of Lorik.
When I’d made the decision to return to the Healers’ Guild, to take on a shift every single day, I hadn’t quite known what to expect. Only that I’dneededto. I’d felt that need so strongly in my chest that it had felt crushing.
It was partly to do with Lorik. My aching heart hadn’t been able to withstand the quiet of my cottage and the familiarity of the daily routine I’d created there. I’d been restless, grieving, overthinking, heartbroken, and angry…and I knew if I didn’t changesomething, it would drive me mad.
Lorik had been the catalyst…but I’d known for a long time, hadn’t I? I’d known that if I didn’t start living a different life, if I didn’t start filling it with things I wanted, not things that were comfortable and familiar, then I would die alone. I would never know love. I would never have a family of my own. I would become bitter and angry. And I didn’t want to be.
The night after I’d given Lorik the shadevine-hive heart, I’d had a dream that I’d transformed into a Shade. A lifeless,soulless Shade, wandering the Black Veil, in search of something but never quite being able to find it.
I’d woken in a cold sweat, crying, gripping my chest as if I could’ve squeezed my hand around my heart like I had in the hive.
That morning, I’d gotten dressed…and I’d gone straight into Rolara. Nothing had deterred me from my path to the Healers’ Guild hall, tucked against the north end of the village, and I’d gone straight to Salladar, the head of the guild. I’d told him I wanted a daily shift, one he’d hesitantly given me. It’d had nothing to do with my ability. Salladar knew my ability better than anyone…he’d trained me himself, after all, when I’d first started my studies after leaving Correl’s.
But the sudden change in me had likely startled him, whereas all I’d felt was determination and desperation. I’d taken an oath to help the people of Allavar. I’d turned my back on it in the last decade. I could understand his reluctance. I didn’t know what he’d seen in my eyes that morning, but he’d let me stay, on the condition that I helped with the guild’s glowflies once every week.
The pay was meager, but it gave me a renewed sense of purpose again. I talked to more people in a day than I had in the previous month combined. People began to greet me in town, the whispers beginning to die out though I did still catch a few now and again—no doubt curious why I was in Rolara every day. I’d even caught sight of Veras a few times, but he’d only nodded at me, his familiar guard always trailing him. There was an unspoken truce between us. Tentative but there.
And in the evenings, I returned to my cottage. If Peek was displeased that I was away from the cottage for longer some days, he didn’t show it. My only worry in returning to the cottage every night was that I’d be gone too long.
After I’d taken the shadevine-hive heart, I’d done my absolute best to keep the remaining glowflies alive without the queen. I heated a large spherical river rock every morning and every evening. I woke in the middle of the night at least once too. It was large enough that it kept the entire hive warm for hours, and I figured it must’ve been working because the glowflies were still alive. Even without the queen, they still worked for me, tending to the shadevines.
I didn’t know how long it would work. But I would wake up every hour in the dead of winter if it meant saving them. I owed it to them.
Walking through the Black Veil now, I wondered what I would do in a few weeks when the sun would set long before my shift at the guild hall ended.
Veras had said that more and more Shades were roaming the Black Veil, and while I had yet to encounter one on my walks home, I knew it might only be a matter of time. I’d always seen them, here and there. They stayed far away, and I knew that Peek would protect me. But knowing that there was unrest in the Below, that Lorik was frightened about something…it had made me uneasy every single night.
I never breathed a sigh of relief until I stepped beyond Peek’s boundary, and I wondered if I should start bringing him into Rolara with me for extra protection come winter.
Peek might even like it,I thought. He could wander the streets and spy on people while I worked in the guild hall.
