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He looked up at her. “You don’t need to worry about it,” he said. “I know things have been uncomfortable, but I wouldn’t eliminate someone from the program for personal reasons.”
“I know you wouldn’t,” Emily said. “But I can self-eliminate for those reasons.”
He blinked at her. “Are you saying youwantto be transferred?”
“I do, yes.”
“Why?”
“Well, I…” She trailed off, unsure of what to say. She didn’t want to tell him the whole truth — that she hadn’t been able to get past her feelings for him. She would have been too embarrassed to confess that to him. “I don’t think emergency medicine is the right choice for me,” she said after a moment.
And they both saw right through that. She was sure of it. There was no way he believed that was the real reason after watching her go through this internship for the past three months. He knew she had been thriving here, and he knew how much she had been enjoying the work.
He also knew just as well as she did what had happened to make things change.
For a moment, Emily thought he might try to persuade her to stay, and she wondered what she would say if he did. Was there anything he could do at this point to talk her into it?
In the end, it didn’t matter. He turned away from her. “I’ll let Dr. Nash know that I’ve given my permission for the transfer,” he said. “Beginning next week, you’ll report to him instead of to me.”
“I wonder if I could make the switch earlier?” she asked. “It’s just that I’m anxious to get started over there.”
“You want to go start in pediatrics tomorrow?” He waved a hand at her dismissively. “That’s fine by me. Do what you want. I’ll make sure the paperwork is handled tonight.”
She hesitated for a moment. The occasion seemed to call for some sort of comment. She ought to say something, but she couldn’t think what.
“Thank you,” she said at last, and hoped he understood that she wasn’t just thanking him for taking care of her paperwork. She meant to thank him for everything that had taken place between the two of them from the day they had met until now.
But he didn’t respond to her thanks. He turned and walked into the patient’s room, leaving her standing in the hall and staring after him wordlessly.
CHAPTER 19
EMILY
“So how’s pediatrics?” Sara asked.
The two of them were in the cafeteria having lunch together. Emily had told Sara that she had to meet in the one o’clock hour, which wasn’t true — Dr. Nash was comfortable letting her take her break whenever she wanted to, as long as there were enough people on the ward to cover it. But she knew from experience that Dominic would be in the cafeteria during the twelve o’clock hour, and she didn’t want to see him.
“It’s good,” she said, taking a bite of her tuna fish sandwich. The French onion soup smelled delicious today, but soup and salad had been something she’d eaten with Dominic, and it was impossible to choose it right now without thinking about him.
She didn’t want to think about him. Every time she slipped and allowed it to happen, she found herself getting unbearably sad.
“Pediatrics is good,” she said, forcing herself to focus on her friend. “It seems like I haven’t been over there very long.”
“I mean, three weeks isn’t that long,” Sara said.
“No, but things move so fast in the hospital,” Emily said. “I’ve gotten to know a lot of new patients. And they’re not like the ER patients, you know — they usually stick around for a good long while. That’s something I like about it, although it’s always a big party when we get to kick someone off the ward and send them home. It just happened today, actually. Little girl named Caitlin with a kidney disease. We got it under control. She’s not going to need dialysis.”
“Oh, that’s great.” Sara grinned. “I hate it when kids have to do dialysis.”
“Me too. But I love the kids,” Emily said. “They’re so special, Sara. I’ve always liked our patients, but the kids just bring such a positive attitude to being in the hospital. It’s so surprising to me. They’re going through what’s probably the worst experience of their lives, and I walk into those rooms every day and they have a big smile for me. It really puts things in perspective, you know? It’s hard to be upset about anything in your own life when the kids in pediatrics are smiling at you every day.”
“Maybe Dr. Berger should transfer to pediatrics,” Sara said with a laugh.
“What do you mean?”
“Oh, just that he’s moodier than ever lately. I thought he might be easier to be around after the three-month cut, but it hasn’t been like that.”
“I would have thought so too,” Emily said.
