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“Sure,” she said. “But I only have a second. People will start leaving now that we’ve had cake. I need to wish them goodnight. I’m the hostess.”
“Of course, yeah.” I turned toward her, just her outline visible against the light spilling in from the open barn door. “Okay, well.” I took a deep breath, trying to still my racing heart, to make sense of the thoughts flying through my mind. “I looked at houses today.”
That wasn’t quite where I’d hoped to start.
Tess turned to look at me, and even in the dark I could see her eyebrows go up in confusion. “Um. Okay,” she said slowly. “Wait, what?”
“To buy. I bought a house here.” Closer. Still nonsensical.
Think, Ryan.
This was easier when I had a script.
Tess didn’t speak immediately, so I tried again. “I’m going to have a home here. I love it here—the water, the trees. It’s so different than any place I’ve ever been.”
“Oh.” There was an edge of disappointment there, and I realized I didn’t say what I needed to say. “Okay, well …” Tess moved to stand and I caught her hand.
“Wait, please.” I held her soft hand between my palms, resisting the urge to bring my mouth to her smooth skin. “It’s not just the scenery, Tess. I want to be here to be close to you, to give us a chance.”
Tess tugged on her hand, but I didn’t let it go, standing to face her instead.
“Ryan, that doesn’t make any sense,” she said, shaking her head and sounding small and defeated in the darkness. “People don’t do things like that. I mean, buy a vacation home, sure, yeah. But you’re not going to stay here. You’re not going to live here.”
“Why not?”
“Because you’re Ryan McDonnell!”
My name sounded like a curse on her lips.
“You’re a movie star, and women all over the world throw themselves at you. You’ve got a rising career, you’re linked to America’s Sweetheart. Southern Maryland has nothing to offer you.”
“It has you, Tess.” I kept her hand in mine, but lifted my other hand to capture her jaw, to still the shaking of her head. “It has everything I want because it has you.”
I felt her soften beneath my touch, and though there were more words that needed to be said, more things that had to be cleared up and explained, in the moment, I brought my lips to hers because the universe demanded it, pulling us together like it was meant to be. She melted into my touch, and as our lips met, I felt my future unfurl before me like a long ribbon with no end, undulating in the breeze blowing over the Potomac.
This.
But a second later it was over, the ribbon snapping and sinking beneath the murky water.
“Ryan, no.” Tess broke the kiss, pulled herself from my arms. “This isn’t right. You’re with my sister, and I’m not getting in the middle of all of that. I don’t live in the same world you do, and I can’t afford to get swept up in movie star fantasies. I’m too old for that. I live in the real world.” Her voice broke as she said, “Just stay away from me, and then go home. Go back to Hollywood, where you belong.”
She turned and walked out the big barn door, leaving me standing in the dark, my heart racing and my future becoming a distant icon as she moved away from me.
More than ever, I knew exactly what I wanted.
I wanted her, and I didn’t care about anything else.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Tess
Ipractically ran out of the barn. The last thing I needed was more time in his arms, more ideas blooming in my mind about what might be possible between us. I’d settled myself with reality this afternoon. Movie stars were Juliet’s business, not mine. And I wouldn't survive the heartbreak that would come with Ryan McDonnell.
I slid back into my seat next to Granny, ignoring her questioning stare, and shoveled a huge bite of my waiting cake into my mouth.
“Jesus, slow down, Tess,” Granny said, cringing at my gluttony. “You’ve already had a brush with death once today, and I swear to God I’m going first. I’ll stab myself with this butter knife if I have to.” She picked up a piece of flatware from the table and waved it menacingly as I scarfed down cake.
Hell, if I couldn't have Ryan, at least I could have chocolate and cherries. I closed my eyes and forced myself to enjoy it. Yes. Cake. I would have a future filled with sugary smooth cake and frosting. It would be glorious, and I would just have to get bigger kayaks. And bigger clothes to fully accommodate the true love of my life. Chocolate cake.
