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But the way he looked at me now seemed to convey more than just guilt.
I wondered if Alex felt the same way about me as I felt about him.
Did he experience the same intense, all-consuming emotions? Did he also dream about me at night, only to wake up to an empty bed, wishing I was there with him? Did he miss my voice like I missed his, or his laugh?
Or did he too have doubts? Was there a part of him that regretted sleeping with me in the first place? Or wished he had run away instead of offering his support when I had told him about the pregnancy?
Maybe. Possibly. I hoped not.
I was so close to his face I could smell his minty breath, the spearmint gum he had chewed on his way here, and study the fine lines of age on his handsome features.
Alex pulled me closer to him, moving one hand to the back of my neck, fingers curling in my hair. As if our mouths were magnets, attracted by all the ways we were different, he crushed his lips to mine and kissed me hard.
My entire body buzzed with newfound energy, the tears drying up as if they weren’t significant anymore, just like those reservations.
None of that was important right now, not while Alex pulled me over him until my knees straddled his hips and his palms pressed flat against my lower back, tugging me closer to him.
“I will do something about it tomorrow,” he said softly, his breath warm against my chin.
“No,” I replied, shaking my head, smoothing my hands up his biceps until I rested my arms on his shoulders, encircling his neck, drawing us even closer together. “I will take care of it. There’s going to come a time when she just has to stop, for her own health.” All that anger couldn’t be good for a person.
“We’ll give it another two weeks,” said Alex, his hands sliding toward my spine. “If there’s no change, I’ll talk to her in person.” He then skated his palms up my back to my neck.
Heat flooded my body, drummed through my hips, and settled deep below my navel. I wanted him so badly it physically hurt.
Dipping my head down, I brushed my nose against his, then our cheeks, and then he did what I wanted him to do—he drew my face to his again, and with his grip on my neck, he perfectly aligned our mouths.
He kissed me again. This time slipping his tongue between my lips, exploring, the same way his hand moved across my shoulder, down to my collarbone, and on the side of my chest, his thumb brushing the soft space of my breast.
Nothing was stopping us from taking things further, except it wouldn't just be sex, not like those other times. This would feel different, more intimate, more powerful, like making love instead.
I knew Alex thought so too. I could feel it, not just in the way his hands were sliding down my waist to my thighs, fingers running across my bare skin, or the hardness between his legs. No, I felt it in the way his gaze seemed to search the depths of me.
“If you don’t want this,” he whispered, his breath hot against my chin, “then you need to tell me, Sophie, because I do. I want to take every piece of clothing off your body. You are absolutelygorgeous.” His mouth was on my neck as he spoke, his words vibrating through me, and then he reached his palms to my face and, with his thumbs, dried my tears.
“I do,” I whispered, so softly I wondered if he heard. But then he stood up with me in his arms, and I coiled my legs around his hips, squeezing tighter while he carried me to the bedroom.
CHAPTER 18
Alex
Sophie was as light as a feather, her weight almost nothing in my arms. Even with her thighs pressed tightly against my hips and her hands around my neck, I didn’t feel anything other than the deep-rooted need to be with her.
I flicked on the light switch and walked into her bedroom, not setting her down yet.
Sophie’s fingers moved up and knotted in my hair while our lips locked, our tongues slipping in and out and meeting in the middle.
I broke the kiss and moved my lips to them, pressing them softly against her cheeks.
I didn’t loosen my grip or move toward the bed. I only let the kiss go on, embraced the way Sophie slid her hands down my neck, encircling me in her arms. This moment was everything. My heart was racing, the sound of it echoing in my ears. I wondered if Sophie could hear it, if she could hear just how crazy she made me. If she knew just how much of an effect she had on me.
“If you don’t put me on that bed right now, Alex,” she said softly, kissing my jaw, “and take off all my clothes,”—she movedher lips up to my cheekbone and then back down to my mouth—, “then I’m going to scream.”
“We don’t want that.” I chuckled, pulling Sophie tighter to me. Then I stepped toward the bed and relaxed my grip, waiting until her feet touched the floor before I let go completely.
I smoothed my hands up her arms to her neck and cupped her chin in my right hand, angling her mouth up to mine. She twisted her hands into my shirt, her breath raspy against my mouth, caught the hem, and lifted it over my head.
Everything was happening in a haze of slowness, as if the world had stopped spinning on its axis, and time itself had decided to stretch the moment.
