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I would’ve smacked my palm to my mouth, but then Alex climbed back on top of me, his skin hot against mine, yet goose bumps still broke out in tiny painful prickles.
I wanted him inside of me now, but there was something I wanted even more—to feel him. All of him, and the only way to do that was through an unfamiliar touch, something I hadn’t done with him before.
Reaching between us, my fingers wrapped around him and his breath changed, turning sharper, shallower as he moved himself within my hand, slowly and heavily at first, and then speeding up slightly.
By the look on his face, I was sure he was going to come.
But then he gripped my wrist and urged my hand free.
His mouth was back on mine, colliding furiously, sending stars up like fireworks in the dim room where only a bedsidelamp—the bulb weak—gave little light. Still, I could see all the different aspects of Alex; the doctor who cared for his patients, the man whose heart was broken, and the future father of our children.
He was extremely beautiful.
This moment, despite its wrongness, despite the baby hormones kick-starting the whole thing, was beautiful, and I couldn’t get enough of him. A feeling I knew would evaporate as soon as I came, as soon as my climax spread down my legs, but I didn’t care.
It was so fucking worth it.
Alex moved on top of me again, wasting no time before he moved inside of me, my legs wrapping around him, coiling around his hips, eager to get as close as possible.
I buried my mouth against his shoulder, briefly wondering if we needed a condom but then remembering I was pregnant.
At least that was a plus.
My hands raked down Alex’s back, absorbing every taut muscle and ridge of his body, pulling him even closer while he pushed himself deeper into me. Every inch of me was aching for him. I wanted him so bad, needed him, and the uncertainty that was peeling me open like an orange grew weaker, as if Alex was putting each segment back into its rightful place.
Before I knew it, Alex had flipped us over so he was on his back and I was sitting on top of him, straddling him, bouncing myself up and down while he moved in and out of me. My palms were flat on his chest, my nails digging into his hard flesh.
“Fuck, Sophie. I can’t get over how gorgeous you are,” he groaned, his thumbs digging into the creases at my hips while the rest of his hands spanned over my ass, squeezing at every dip and rise.
Alex rocked deeper and then harder, his hips moving up and down with mine, and those stars just kept getting brighter, more pronounced, as if they were closing in.
All of a sudden, he sat up and pulled me into his lap, flattening his palm against my back, moving me with every roll and tilt of his hips.
We kept going like this, our mouths colliding just like our bodies did, and soon enough the stars exploded, falling like tiny balls of fire all around us, rendering our bodies lifeless.
I rolled off him and lay flat on the bed, my chest heaving, breath aching as it filled my lungs once more.
When the stars faded, that uncertainty about my future came back, creeping in like dust under a door, and everything we had just done suddenly seemed like a mistake. It worsened when I remembered Vicki—who kept leaping into my head at the most inopportune times.
What would she say if she knew I had slept with Alex, not once but twice? How hurt would she feel? Would she want Alex back?
My stomach clenched.
Of course, she would. Vicki was a proud woman. She’d take offense. But that didn’t mean she didn’t have the right to know.
Sooner rather than later.
Turning to face Alex, I felt a strange airy relief when his hand went to my hip, his thumb brushing along the bony ridge. He was smiling, his eyes glossy and satisfied.
“Alex,” I said, softly, gazing down at his smooth hard chest. “I’m going to tell Vicki about the pregnancy on Monday.”
Not about us,I thought,since there isn’t an us. This was just baby hormone-driven sex.
Nothing more.
He took a deep breath in, his hand still on my hip, and nodded. “Okay.”
“But I don’t want you to be there.”
