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“If you’re fine, I’m going to head to bed. I have to be up early tomorrow.”
Milo saluted him and watched as he walked away from the doorway. He hoped Harper would follow, but no such luck. She sat down on the bed beside him and took his hand in hers.
“I’m worried,” she said. “Ever since that night, you seem… off. I mean you put on a good act. I doubt anybody else notices, but I know you better than anyone. You can’t just pretend like it didn’t happen.”
“I’m sorry if I don’t want to talk about it like the fucking weather.” He closed his eyes as soon as the words were out, guilt eating away at his gut. She was only trying to help.
“I’m not asking you to. We don’t talk about the fucking weather ever. I’m asking you to let me in, to tell me what you’re going through.”
“Why, so you can try to fix me? Make me one more person you resent?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Your mother. Tom.”
“I do not resent my brother, and you damn well know it. You better take that back.”
“You love him, everyone knows that. But don’t sit here and act like you don’t use him as your reason for not going to college, for not pursuing your dreams. He’s your brother, but you use him as a crutch.”
“I hate you!”
“Probably better that way.”
“You’re probably right. I don’t know who you are right now, but you’re not my Milo.”
“Don’t you get it? I was never your Milo to begin with. You used me to fill a void.”
“In the beginning, yes! But you know damn well that all changed after our first night together. It wasn’t just sex. It was special. Deny it all you want, but you’d be lying to me and yourself. I don’t know what you’re going through. You won’t talk to me, won’t let me in.”
His hands thrust through his hair. “I won’t talk to you because I don’t know what the hell I’m feeling! My life was going great, and next thing I know I have a gun shoved into my neck, and my fucking life flashed before my eyes. And you want to know what I saw in those moments? I saw you.”
“You did?”
“Yes, every version of you from that day in first grade when I first laid eyes on you until now. I realized that my entire life has been epically better because I met you. And I don’t want to hold you back. You have always wanted to leave this town, and I keep thinking if you meet some else maybe he can take you away, give you the life you’ve always wanted. And maybe you were right. Maybe it would be the push your mom needs to get her life back on track. You’ll never know if I stick around and keep you from seeing what else is out there.”
She stepped closer to him, lifting her hand to his cheek and cupping his jaw. “I’ve seen what else is out there, and in the end, I always come home to you. It’s like the whole time the universe was trying to tell me that I didn’t need to be searching; everything I have ever wanted was waiting for me at home.”
“What are you saying?”
“I’m saying that I’m in love with you, and I think I have been for a really long time. I was just too stubborn to see it.”
“You, stubborn?”
She shoved his shoulder. “I’m trying to make a speech here.”
He held his hands up in defense. “Sorry, continue. You’re in love with me.”
She nodded. “I am, so if you’re okay with a girl who doesn’t have it quite together, has a mom who makes life difficult, and friends who will kick your ass if you ever hurt me, I don’t want to sneak around anymore. Even though I’m sure everyone knows anyway. We weren’t exactly discreet and we live in the land of gossip, but still,Iwant them to know that I’m in love with my best friend.” He smiled, and her eyes locked on his. “Don’t you have anything to say?”
“I didn’t want to interrupt your speech. Are you done?”
“Yes, I’m done smartass.”
“Good because I’m in love with you too.” He grabbed her face and pulled her lips to his, savoring the sweetness that was his Harper. He pulled back, resting his head against hers. “It’s always been you, Harp. Always.”
She tilted her head and kissed him. Pain radiated up his head, and he groaned as he ripped his lips from Harper and spun. Jasper stood there, a massive smile on his face. Milo rubbed at his head. “What the hell?”
“You told me to.”
