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“Nick, whoa, slow down. How are you going to get to the hospital, you’re?—”
“I’m in Tahoe,” I explain, heading toward the exit. “I just landed; it’s why my phone was off.”
“You’re in Tahoe?” Max repeats.
“Yeah, look it’s a long fucking story and I really need to see your dad and Gerry, but first, I gotta go see Lis, Max. I have to. I don’t care what time it is.”
I feel fucking sick at the thought that Lis has been hurt and I wasn’t here. And I know Max says she’s alright and I am so grateful that he was with her when this happened, given all his training, but fuck, I should’ve been here. I should have been the one to be with her.
Really, I never should have left in the first place.
“Okay, I’m not sure they’ll let you in to see her but let me see if I can’t call in a favor for you,” Max says.
I flag down a taxi, shoving my shit into the trunk. “Thanks, Max, seriously, I really appreciate it.”
“All good, Nick. I know this is a shock and I’m sorry I had to tell you all this over the phone, but I’m glad you’re here.”
“I know, me too,” I reply with a nod, as I sink into the backseat of the taxi, my whole body now shaking as everything that could have happened hits me.
When I getto the hospital, Max is waiting out the front for me and when he walks over and pulls me into a hug, it takes everything in me not to break down and cry like a damn baby. My hands are still shaking, and my heart is beating so fast I’m wondering if I’m going to have a heart attack.
“You okay?” he asks, pulling back.
“No,” I reply, shaking my head, trying to stay calm. “I’m going in, I’ve gotta see her, I’ve?—”
“It’s cool, Nick, I spoke to the nurse on duty, she’s going to let you in for a bit. I’ll put your stuff in my car and wait for you. Take you home when you’re done.”
I’m shaking my head before he’s even finished. “I’m not leaving, I’m staying with her.”
Max chuckles. “Yeah, not sure they’ll let you, but you can try.”
“Yeah, well they can try and get me to leave, but that’s definitely not happening.”
Max just laughs, gripping my shoulder tightly. “Alright, well she’s in room 240. I’ll take your stuff and wait for a bit. Text me when you know what you’re doing.”
“Thank you,” I whisper, so grateful for my friend.
He slaps my back once and then I head inside, leaving all my stuff with him as I make my way over to the elevators. Up on the second floor, I check the signs for where Lis’ room is, walking straight past the nurse’s station. I expect the older woman to stop me, but all she does is smile and give me a small nod and once again, I am grateful for Max and everything he’s done.
When I reach Lis’ room, I ease the door open. It’s quiet and dark inside, but with the small nightlight, I can make her out in the bed. My heart is still pounding, the beats loud in the silence of her room as I shrug out of my jacket, dropping it over the back of the chair before kicking off my shoes.
Then I carefully climb into the bed behind her, curling my arm around her waist as I pull her close, burying my face in her hair as I inhale her scent. Lis jolts awake, turning in my arms, blinking rapidly as she tries to figure out what’s going on.
“Shhh, babe, it’s just me,” I whisper, brushing my lips across her forehead.
“Nick?” she asks, her voice husky with sleep as she pulls back a little, putting a hand on my cheek, almost as if to check I’m real. “What are you doing here?”
I turn and kiss her palm, my eyes closing as I try desperately not to cry, suddenly overcome at the thought that I could have lost her. Lost her and our baby. Lost her for a second time, but in a way that is far more permanent.
“Nick,” she whispers when I don’t answer.
A sob falls from my mouth as I pull her closer, wrapping her in my arms as I bury my face in her neck. “I’m so sorry,” I whisper. “So fucking sorry.”
I feel Lis slip her arm around my waist, her hand on my back as I cry into her neck. I have never regretted leaving as much as I do right now. Never been so scared as I was when Max answered his phone and told me what happened.
“It’s okay, Nick,” she whispers, her hand sliding under my sweater, her fingers against my skin. “I’m alright, the baby’s alright.”
“I could’ve lost you,” I say, choking on the words, unable to stop the tears.
