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He gave me everything I wanted and needed, pleasure and satisfaction. But I’ve never traded sex to get ahead, and it definitely feels like that’s what I did tonight. I’m disappointed in myself and unsure what Dylan thinks of me and about what we did.
I wish I could go back to the moment Dylan walked up to me after Evan spewed his toxicity into my mind. I wish I would’ve told him what Evan said and let him reassure me thatit was completely off-base. We could’ve finished the night with a little more networking, a polite drive home, and a hint of acknowledgement of the sexual tension between us.
That would’ve been infinitely better than this.
Fuck, my head is a mess, and I shove my phone away before snatching it right back up. I glance up for just one second, and Maggie’s wide eyes are matched with an arched brow as she stares at me from our tiny kitchenette.
Finally, I simply text back,Thank you for tonight,and shove my phone under the couch cushion so I don’t say more. Maggie’s eyes seemingly haven’t left me, and I realize she’s still waiting for me to answer. “I did meet people. I got some interviews, and some good leads… I hope.” I sound bitter even to my own ears.
I sink back into the sofa and pull my knees into my chest. My phone buzzes again, but I make no move to grab it.
“You hope?” Maggie asks with her tone prying. She stalks into the room, no doubt wondering what the hell is going on before handing me my tea. I accept the warm mug with both hands, needing every bit of comfort. Without asking, she’s put milk in it, just how I like it at night.
"I fucked up," I admit, letting the overwhelming feeling take over. I can’t believe I actually slept with him… and that I got caught doing it.And that it was that good.What a foolish thing to do. I can’t help thinking how dumb it is, how I have probably just ruined my career.
Maggie gives me a worried look, her eyebrow lifting yet again. I’m going to give this poor girl premature wrinkles on her forehead. "What do you mean?"
Before I can answer, my phone buzzes again, and this time, Maggie points toward its cushion hideout, silently telling me to deal with that. I pull it out, reading the message.
Come to dinner next weekend. Just business.
Just business.
As if it could ever be just businessnow. What we did… I swallow thickly and shove it down. One of the best pieces of advice I was given by a college professor was to meet every offer with a response, never a closed door. And as much as I don’t want to admit it, Dylan opened so many doors for me tonight. If even one of them stays open, I’m still on better footing than I was yesterday.
I read his text again.
It’s too tempting of an offer, and I have to give Dylan credit for one thing. He hasn’t lied to me. He told me exactly why he wanted me to come with him tonight, even when it made him look bad. And when we discussed doing more to exact our revenge on Evan, he was direct and clear about it and what we’d be doing. So if Dylan says something, he means it.
Besides, I’m not sure I can afford to slam any potential doors closed at this point.
Okay. Send details, I’ll meet you there.
As if he was waiting for my answer, he quickly replies,I will. I enjoyed tonight, Raven. I’m glad you were there.
Me too. Goodnight, Dylan.
As I hitSendand the words turn into a bubble markedReadon the screen, I second-guess telling him good night. It feels like something more. Like an offer that will end with my heart shattered.
“Raven,” Maggie says, literally snapping me back to our tiny living room with her right hand.Snap,snap. “What do you mean, you fucked up?”
"I mean, I shouldn't have gotten involved with Dylan,” I reply, taking a sip of my tea. “I’m playing with fire."
“Involved?” Maggie asks, lifting an eyebrow. “Explain.”
“I… might have slept with him tonight,” I admit. “Uhm, not slept with, but you get my point.” I’m definitely not telling her the details about exactlywhereDylan and I had sex. I’ll let Maggie assume that it happened at his place, or in the car afterward, or whatever her heart desires.
I expect Maggie to be shocked, but instead, she smiles happily. “Good for you,” she exclaims matter-of-factly, lifting her own tea cup to clink mugs with me although I keep mine still. “What’s wrong with that?”
I blink, knowing damn well my best friend is playing down the fact that Iamplaying with fire.
“You know exactly why.”
“Well, no one else knows,” she says, and I meet her with a side eye.
“They might.”
“And so what if they do?” she says as if it’s a non-issue. “First off, Evan cheated onyou. Second, you two went how long since you last had sex? I mean seriously, I think Ami’s been getting more action than you recently, and you know how much of a goody two-shoes she can be.”
