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I search his face for clues, but only concern darkens his brown eyes. But no amount of worry can stop my shaking limbs or the terror tearing at my throat. Because besides confrontingTomasso, I’ll have to face Paul. And no man can ever forgive a woman for slicing his dick off, throwing it in the garbage disposal, and walking away.
CHAPTER 28
Lakeshia
The ride home doesn’t penetrate the fog separating me from feeling anything but fear. It’s nothing like the panic attacks. With those I sought to disassociate, now I can’t seem to grasp a thought for more than a second. I glance down at my closed fists, unable to feel relief that Shinji cleaned me before we left the house. The alarm ringing all the warnings inside my head deafens me to everything.
Tomasso will take everything from me, not just my life. After finally finding a reason to live, to genuinely live a life where friendships and family became a possibility, there’s no way I’ll have that now.
Shinji pulls into the garage, and Takeshi is at my door, pulling me out.
“What happened?” He glances at me then his husband.
“I’m not sure myself.” Shinji frowns, then nods toward the house. “Let’s take this inside. You need to wash up.”
Shinji’s words finally penetrate and I get a good look at Takeshi.
“You’re hurt?” I pat him down, looking for the source of the blood.
He grabs my hands and only when I peer into his face does he say, “It’s not mine. I’m unharmed.”
As if sensing my disbelief, he sighs and pulls me along. Shinji stalks us from behind, his usual ability to lighten the mood conspicuously absent.
We enter the house. Without stopping, Takeshi leads us through our bedroom to the bathroom while I docilely follow. While Takeshi undresses, Shinji strips me then himself. When we’re all nude, Shinji guides me into the shower where Takeshi awaits us.
The space can fit six people easily. Multiple shower heads in the ceiling and walls provide a full-shower experience where everyone gets drenched in the soothing downpour.
As if by tacit agreement, no one breaks the silence. Steam from the hot water fogs the air, enclosing us in an alternate reality where the horrors I’ve relived continue to fade into my past. I’m here where I need to be, with my loves.
The remaining blood on Takeshi’s body runs in rivulets until the water clears. Shinji and Takeshi take their time running a soapy washcloth over my body, and the fear that has stolen my voice begins to lessen, become more manageable, more like my survival mode days. I can function, if only at half my usual scale.
Feeling more human, I take the cloth from Takeshi and lose myself in cleaning him. Having his skin under mine and his vibrant dragon tattoos at my fingertips, reminds me he’s here. He’s with me where I need him. I turn my attention to Shinji who accepts my touch, although many questions remain under his curious gaze. Washing my men unlocks a new need, something familiar yet novel.
I’m not sure I’m ready to discuss what happened at the Valley house, but I am ready for something more substantive. I need to reestablish my connection to Shinji and Takeshi.
Without saying a word, I leave the shower and take my position in the bedroom.
Shinji and Takeshi stop in their tracks when they come upon me kneeling on the floor, naked and waiting.
“Lakeshia?” Shinji calls, breaking the silent blanket we’re under.
“Are you sure? You’ll have to follow the same rules as before,” he reminds me.
Unlike Shinji, Takeshi knows what I’m asking for but can’t yet verbalize.
I hesitate before nodding at each of them. “I need both of you inside me. At the same time.”
“Fuck!” Shinji’s breath whooshes out. “Shouldn’t we talk about what happened first?”
Takeshi splays his hand across Shinji’s chest. “Lakeshia has told us what she needs. Our questions can wait.”
I smile gratefully at Takeshi.
“Stay where you are,” he says to Shinji before turning his dark eyes on me and closing the gap between us to circle me.
I try to follow his movements, but when he disappears behind my back, I remember my role; to surrender to his will. Deep down, I need this to reassure myself we’ll survive and thrive. That neither Tomasso nor Paul can destroy the dreams we want to build.
“You want both of us at the same time, huh? So many options.” Takeshi slides his finger through the crease of my ass, then pulls my hair, bowing my head backward. “Choices, choices, choices.” He licks my lips before ending the caress with a nip. His voice deepens when he says, “And they’re all”—Hepushes his hand between my thighs and plunges his fingers in my unprepared pussy—“Mine.”
