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Sine
I knewwe had to discuss the baby, but I needed to know where things stood between us. That would tell me what to expect when we discussed his involvement. I promised myself that I’d accept whatever he wanted.
He was quiet for several seconds, each one stretching out until I was worried that I’d asked the wrong thing.
“What is it you want to happen, Sine?” His voice was soft.
My pulse hadn’t slowed from the moment I knocked on his door, but it seemed to beat double-time at the question. I’d given him my forgiveness, and he seemed to genuinely care about what happened, but I wouldn’t be fooled into mistaking wishful thinking for something more solid.
Coming here was a risk, not only because I hadn’t been certain of the welcome I’d receive, especially once I shared my news, but because I knew he had the power to break my heart.
But I also knew that if I didn’t take a chance now, I’d regret it. I’d never been a coward, and I’d never forgive myself if I turned into one now.
I had to lay it all out there.
“I want...” I laid my hand on my stomach. It was still flat, but I’d found myself standing that way from the moment I’d seen that plus sign. As if I could feel my son or daughter already there, growing inside me.
Alix’s gaze followed my hand, and I watched the expression on his face change, as if somehow my gesture made it real to him, the same way the test had made it for me.
“I want us to be together,” I said the words simply, forcing myself not to rush through them. “I want us to see if this works. You and me and...”
“Our baby,” he finished.
I nodded, then forced myself to add, “If that isn’t what you’ll be wanting, I’ll understand. And I won’t be asking you for anything, should you not wish to be a part–”
I lost the rest of what I intended to say when his mouth came down on mine. I felt the hunger in his kiss all the way down to my bones, and the desire I’d been keeping down came rushing forward. I grabbed the front of his shirt, holding him close, letting everything I felt pour into him. If I walked away with my heart in shreds, I would do it with everything left on the table.
He pulled back after a moment, then rested his forehead against mine.
“You asked me what I want,” he said as he cupped my face. “I want you.”
He dropped his hand between us and placed it on my stomach. The heat of his palm warmed me through the thin cotton of my t-shirt.
“I want us.”
A surge of hope went through me, strong enough that I couldn’t quite suppress it. “I want to be certain I understand you...”
He held my chin in one hand, keeping our eyes locked. “Then let me be clear. I want you in my life. I want our child in my life. I want it to be our life. Our family.”
If I was a different sort of woman, I might have melted into a puddle after hearing those words. But I didn’t melt. What I did was take a shaky breath, then let it out with all the tension I’d been holding.
“I love you, Sine.” He brushed his lips across mine. “And I want you to be mine.”
A lump formed in my throat, and I felt tears burning in my eyes.
Apparently, I was that sort of woman.
Damned hormones.
“I am yours,” I managed to whisper. “For as long as you’ll want me.”
“Forever,” he said earnestly. “I want you forever.”
He kissed me again, hands sliding around my waist, and then down to cup my behind through my jeans. He pulled me tight against him, and I wound my arms around his neck, needing to feel the hard press of his body to assure me that I wasn’t dreaming, wasn’t imagining his words. I hadn’t let myself hope for this, no matter how much I wanted it.
I dug my hands into his hair, pushed myself up on my toes as I nipped at his bottom lip. He groaned, his hands squeezing my ass, and a bolt of desire went through me, the sort of desire that only he could make me feel.
My memory hadn’t done reality any justice.
