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The sensations are overwhelming, and I writhe beneath him, wanting more, needing him closer. I want to drown in him; I want him to erase all the pain inside me, the hurt I’ve buried deep down since I was a child, all of which has risen to the surface, threatening to shatter me into a million pieces. If I’m going to collapse, if I’m going to feel obliterated to my core, then I want James to be the one to do it. I want him to fuck the soul out of me until I feel nothing but him.
“Laila love,” he whispers to me, bringing his mouth up to my neck, causing lightning strikes along my spine. “Tell me what you need from me.”
“I need to feel,” I manage to say. “I need to feel you and only you. Nothing else.”
“Then I will make you feel me,” he says roughly. He kisses me, his mouth claiming mine in a brutal, desperate kiss that leaves me breathless. He pulls away, his forehead resting against mine, and I’m panting and bereft, my body aching for him. His eyes search mine, and he whispers thickly, “I will make you feel everything. I’m going to make you come so hard you’ll see stars.”
I believe him.
I reach down and unzip my jeans, and he helps me wriggle out of them and my underwear until I’m totally naked. If it were any other time I might have felt insecure about being with him like this—I’ve gained quite a bit of weight since we were last together—but right now I don’t care much about anything. To be worried about something like belly rolls or cellulite seems trivial and pointless when you realize how little it matters in the grand scheme of life.
With an appreciative, molten look in his eyes as he appraises my naked body, his hand slides down my belly, his fingers slipping between my legs, and then he kisses me deep again, his tongue sliding against mine, and I moan into his mouth as his fingers enter me. I’m wet and ready, and he sinks into me easily, his fingers moving in and out of me as his thumb circles my clit. I cry out, the pleasure intense and instantaneous. I arch my back, my hands fisted in the sheets as he increases the pressure, and I feel myself spiraling out of control. I’m so close, so goddamn close to losing myself to him, and then he slides two fingers inside me and I shatter, the orgasm ripping through me with quick and brutal force. I cry out, my body writhing beneath his, and he doesn’t let up, prolonging my pleasure until I’m a quivering mess. There’s a locked box of emotions just below the surface, and I’m scared that he might just have the key.
“I know that wasn’t enough,” he says, and he starts moving down my body, wet kisses trailing over my stomach. I manage to raise my head to meet his eyes as they glint with hunger. His mouth moves lower, never breaking eye contact, and he parts my legs wider with his large hands. A wicked grin curls his lips, and he lowers his head. I moan loudly as his lips brush against my clit, my head going back. I’m so sensitive after my orgasm that it only takes a few strokes of his tongue before I’m moaning and begging for more. There’s always so much begging with him.
“Does that feel good, love?” he asks hoarsely, placing a kiss on my inner thigh, his breath hot. “Should I keep going?”
I can’t answer, I’m too lost in the pleasure, but he doesn’t need an answer. He knows what I want. He knows me so well. His tongue swirls around my clit, and I shatter again, crying out as the pleasure washes over me in waves. I’m trembling, my body weak and pliant as he keeps licking me, savoring me with lips and mouth and tongue, until I feel close to coming, the tension coiling up inside me like a snake. I’m crying out, unable to control myself, and then he plunges two fingers inside me and I come apart, the pleasure so intense I nearly black out.
“Jesus, James,” I manage to say, my voice hoarse and raw. “Oh god.”
The orgasm flows through me, a golden fire licking through my veins. My eyes are closed, but I can see bright colors behind my eyelids like a rainbow. I’m moaning and crying out his name, and it’s both beautiful and torturous.
James is still between my legs, his mouth latched on to my clit, drawing on it with lips and teeth, his big hands cupping my ass, lifting me up to his sucking mouth until I nearly beg for him to stop.
Finally he pulls back. He doesn’t say a word, he just brings his fingers out of me and shoves them into his mouth, savoring me, and I can’t help but stare, my breath catching. He’s staring at me, his gaze hot and dangerous, and I feel myself growing wet again.
He moves up to kiss me, his lips seeking mine out so that I can taste myself.
“You’re so beautiful, Laila,” he murmurs, his fingers tracing over my cheek. “So bloody beautiful.”
He kisses me again, and I can feel his smile against my lips. I’m boneless, completely spent, and I can only lie there and let him kiss me and touch me. I’m in danger of falling for him, and I know I should be scared, but I can’t bring myself to care. I’m safe with him. I know I am.
“Come on,” he says, moving over me. He slips an arm underneath my waist and flips me over so I’m on my stomach. I try to roll over, wanting to see him as he fucks me, but he pins me to the bed, laughter in his voice. “I’m not done with you yet.” He rests a hand on my waist, tilting my hips up so I’m on my knees and my ass exposed to him.
He lines up behind me, and then I feel the head of his cock pressing against me and I moan, arching my back, but he doesn’t enter me yet.
“Tell me what you want, Laila.” He leans forward and breathes into my ear.
“I want you,” I say, my body aching with need. I’m still trembling from the orgasms he’s given me, but I still want him inside me. I want him to pleasure me again and again and again. Put me out of my mind.
He teases me, rubbing the tip of his cock along my entrance, and I cry out.
“Please, James.”
“Tell me what you want, Laila.”
“Fuck me. Make me forget.”
“I’m going to fuck you,” he agrees. “I’m going to fuck you until you can’t think, can’t feel anything but me.”
The blunt tip of his cock presses against my entrance, and I wriggle my ass toward him, wanting him so badly.
But then he pulls back. “Just a minute,” he whispers, and I know he’s looking for a condom. I keep myself spread for him as he kneels up and slips one on, watching him over my shoulder, my mouth parted.
I feel him move back over me, and then he sinks into me, a deep groan escaping his lips as he fills me up, taking his time pushing inside me in a long, slow slide. I gasp and then moan, the sensation of his cock filling me up, stretching me out and making me feel complete. It’s so overwhelming that I close my eyes, reveling in it, feeling his muscles bunch against me as he pulls back and thrusts forward again, slamming back into me, and I gasp, my head falling, the pleasure so sharp and sweet it makes me gasp. His hands are on my hips, holding me in place as he pumps into me, his cock hitting just the right spot, sending shock waves of pleasure through me.
“Jesus, Laila,” he says, his voice strained. “You feel so good.”
