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She rolled her eyes at me. “That was a long time ago, and I was a little kid. I understand if Clara breaks up with you, it’ll be because you messed up.” She wagged her finger. “Don’t mess up, Dad, and we won’t have to worry about it.”
I threw my hands up. “I don’t like how this has all gotten turned around on me.”
“Well, you tried to put the blame on me, so I guess we’re even.”
Her casual accusation was a shot to the solar plexus, sending me falling against my chair. Fuck. She wasn’t wrong, and it stung to admit I’d used my own daughter as a scapegoat. Not that Sage hadn’t had her heart broken back when my ex left, but I’d hung on to that faded memory with such a tight grip, it was in tatters now. Now that my eyes had been opened by my too-wise daughter, I had to admit my own hang-ups had been a big part of me holding back.
If I screwed up and lost Clara, it wouldn’t be an easy recovery for me. My heart was fiending to be hers, but I’d kept it restrained. Because I knew, knew once I fully gave in to this, allowed her to become an integral part of my life, I would never be the same.
I was still kidding myself, though. The days without seeing Clara felt unfinished and off-kilter. It didn’t matter that I’d still had walls up when I’d opened a gate to allow her in. This final step, this arbitrary space I was keeping between us, was my last feeble attempt at self-preservation.
Sage continued talking. “Besides, Clara’s a mom. She wouldn’t just leave me in the dust if she got tired of you. Moms like her wouldn’t do something like that.”
That was a simplistic way to look at things, but the kid was only thirteen. And she wasn’t wrong. Even if I couldn’t keep Clara, she’d be gentle with Sage. It was who she was and why I’d fallen so fucking hard for her.
“She wouldn’t,” I agreed. “So, you think we should invite them over for dinner this week?”
“I do. And they could sleep over if you want.” She picked up her pizza. “Nellie could sleep in my room this time.”
“Maybe.” I smiled at how eager she was to finally get her sleepover with Nellie. “Let me talk to Clara about it, see what she says.”
“Ask her if I can come to her house too.” She swiped a hand in front of herself. “But don’t tell her I asked, okay? ’Cause that’s probably rude. I just bet she has a really nice house, and I want to be able to picture where you’re spending your time when you’re over there without me.”
I cupped the back of her head and leaned over to kiss her forehead. “How did I ever get so lucky to have a kid like you?”
“Don’t know. You must’ve done something right.” She smirked. “I can’t think of what that could be, though…”
“Are you mouthing off to me while in noogie position?” I brought my fist to the top of her head. “Are you asking for trouble, Sagie?”
“Nooo,” she squealed, pulling away from me. Her arms went over her head to protect herself. “I hate noogies with the passion of a thousand burning suns. Besides, I’m too old for them.”
“Nah, you’re never too old for a noogie. Sometimes, I put Uncle Jer in a headlock and rub the hell out of his head. He loves it.”
She giggled. “No he doesn’t. I don’t believe you.”
My brows winged. “Oh, so when he’s calling me an a-hole, you think he means it?”
That earned me a groan. “Oh my god, Dad, you’re such a weirdo. No one likes noogies. That’s a scientific fact.”
“It’s a scientific fact I love you.”
Her cheeks flushed with rosy happiness. “I know.”
My head tilted. “And…?”
“I love you too…obviously.”
After two successful dinners during the week, one at my place, one at Clara’s, Friday night was our first intentional sleepover. Nellie was crashed out on Sage’s trundle bed, and Sage was reading on her e-reader.
Sage whispered good night to me with a big grin on her face as I eased into the hallway. My girl was pleased as punch to have her little friend with her. Nellie had been just as thrilled to sleep in a “big girl bed” next to Sage.
Something settled inside me, having everyone under my roof, just as it had the first time. This whole week, my mood had mellowed. I’d even found it easy to move on from the argument I’d had with Jeremy. That was how I knew this was right. Taking this step with Clara was what we were supposed to be doing.
I walked into my bedroom, spotting Clara in the en suite bathroom, the door open. When she heard me approaching, she turned around, body butter in one hand, face wash in the other.
I leaned against the doorframe and crossed my arms. “What’s happening, mama?”
“These are the things I use.” She held up the skincare. “At first, I thought it was a coincidence that my face cream was here, but then I looked through the drawers and in the shower. Everything’s the same. It’s all my stuff. How—?”
