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“Beautiful, you definitely don’t want it to get cold.” I force a smile and say a quick goodbye before rushing off. I walk fast to catch up, glancing back at Marco as we round the corner. He’s standing there watching us disappear behind the building. I exhale loudly. I’m going to need to stop taking this route.
Max doesn’t say anything and doesn’t let go of Lexi until we get into my apartment. He instructs her to go to the bathroom and wash her hands before we eat. His parental demeanor surprises me. The more I learn about Max and what an amazing man he is, I wonder why he hasn’t settled down. I can tell he adores Lexi as he watches her leave the room. Of course, when his gaze lands on me, he’s not in an adoring mood anymore.
“Who is he?” he presses. He doesn’t waste any time.
I sigh. “A friend. His name is Marco. That’s it. Nothing else,” I exclaim. And really not even a friend anymore.
“He didn’t look at you like he wants to be friends, beautiful,” he says sarcastically.
“I can’t help if someone likes me, Max.” I wonder if Aiden told him about Marco. His name doesn’t seem to trigger any memories, so I’m not going to tell him how we met. And how he named the restaurant after me. Or our little conversation a couple weeks ago. Max is already overprotective of me, I don’t want him to have to worry about something that I can deal with myself.
Later that night, Lexi and I are cuddled up on the couch in warm, soft blankets, watching a Disney movie. I watch her more than the movie. She’s so animated. Her hand reaches into the popcorn bowl, missing it the first time. She doesn’t look down to try again. She just feels around until she hits the popcorn, grabbing a handful and popping it into her mouth.
I’m going to miss her. Miss this. Those caramel-colored eyes looking at me when I wake up and when I put her to sleep at night. They’ve sucked me into a world I didn’t even know I wanted. Motherhood. I can’t even figure out my relationship status so being a mom hasn’t even crossed my mind.
She scoots closer to me and by the look on her face, wide eyes and shoulders scrunched up, we must be at a scary part. I glance at the movie and I’m spot-on. I chuckle to myself and snuggle her closer. Yep, I’m definitely going to miss her.
When I tuck Lexi into bed, I remind her about her aunt coming tomorrow. Her little lip sticks out as she stares at me. Oh, I know, sweet girl, this really sucks. I play with her hair a little and we sing our song, “This Little Light of Mine,” until I’m the only one singing. I lie beside her, listening to her little breaths. Her eyelids flutter and her lips curl up in a smile. I exhale slowly, hoping the dream she’s having shines bright enough to keep the darkness away.
“Have we packed everything?” I ask Lexi, boxing up the last of her clothes. Silence. I turn to find her sitting on my bed, arms and legs crossed, her bottom lip sticking out. I know the feeling. If I weren’t an adult, I’d be doing the same thing. I jump on the bed and wrap my arms around her.
“I’m going to miss you,” she pouts.
“I am going to miss you, too,” I reply, pulling her back so she’s looking at me. “But you can call me anytime. Do you remember my number?”
She nods and repeats it. I tell her I put it in her bag just in case she forgets it, which I’m sure she will. We talk about how much fun she’ll have in Los Angeles. I try to say things that will get her excited about her aunt, talking about mine and what a gift it was to have her in my life. Unfortunately, my aunt wasn’t a bitch. I really hope she’s not as bad as Damon makes her out to be.
“You’re going to what?!” I say, gritting my teeth. So much for my high hopes that Damon was wrong. I hate the woman.
“It’s a great school for girls. She’ll love it there,” Sophia says with a snobby smile. Her uppity voice grates on me. When Lexi’s Aunt Sophia came into my apartment, the first thing that came out of her mouth was how nice my apartment was and how she was surprised I could afford it. I’m standing there introducing her to her niece and that’s what she’s thinking about? My apartment?
“So you’re sending her to a boarding school?” I say, trying to wrap my head around what she’s telling me. My hands fist at my side. I can’t believe I’m sending Lexi away with this woman. At least her assistant is a sweet, older lady and has taken the initiative to pay attention to Lexi because her own flesh and blood can’t be bothered. Right now they are downstairs putting all Lexi’s stuff into the limo, and I’m trying my hardest not to yell some sense into the aunt. If it wasn’t for Lexi’s doctor being here and the social worker, I think I would have.
Dr. Terry must notice my angst because she pulls me into my room. “I know this is hard, Addison,” she says, grabbing my fisted hand. Hard? It’s more like cruel and painful. I don’t want to let her go with that uppity bitch. I plop on the bed, crossing my arms and sigh heavily. Yep, I’m done being an adult. I’m going to pout for a second. When Lexi runs into my room, I straighten and smile.
“Addie, the limo is so huge,” she says, throwing her hands out wide. She hops up and down in excitement. “And it has purple lights inside. Ms. Jackie let me play with all the lights and music. It’s like a dance party in the back of the car.”
My smile remains plastered on my face, watching her animated expressions. I’m seriously going to have Lexi withdrawals when she leaves. There’s nothing like seeing the excitement through a five-year-old’s eyes.
“That sounds so cool,” I say, picking her up. We walk into the living room where a police officer is talking to Sophia and her bodyguard about the officer that will follow them everywhere as a precaution while they are still in town. Given it’s been two weeks and nothing has happened, we’re hoping that Lexi is safe and will be safer when she leaves New York City. That’s the only reason that makes me okay about this whole thing. Not like I have a choice.
We hug and tears are shed as we say our goodbyes. “I’ll miss you, sweet girl. Keep singing and dancing, okay?”
She nods and sniffles as big tears run down her face. I gently swipe them away with my thumb. “Don’t cry. We’ll see each other again. So, it’s not goodbye, it’s I’ll see you later.” Dr. Terry looks at me. I know what she’s thinking. Don’t lie to her. I smile at her. I’m not lying. I will definitely see her again.
Watching her drive away in the limo, my chest hurts. She made such an impact on me in such little time, I’m surprised how much this hurts. I look at Dr. Terry with my arms crossed. “So, why exactly did y’all think this was a good idea to put her with me? Because this sucks.”
Her eyes soften as she wraps her arm around my shoulders. “She brought so much goodness into your life for two weeks, and she leaves you with great memories. Nobody could have bonded with her at the level you did. You understand what she’s going through, even though you were a little older when it happened to you.” I listen to her words and let them soak in. She’s right. And it’s a bond that I’ll never forget.
I run my hand across my unshaven jaw. I’m so fucking tired. Of course, I came home to an empty fridge a couple hours ago, so here I am at the store, waiting in line behind the lady arguing about expired coupons. I close my eyes, shake my head, and sigh. This day can’t get any longer.
Ever since I was instructed to come home a week early to help with a case, my nerves have been on overdrive. The last few months have been a true test of my sanity. My heart belongs to someone who might not want it. My thoughts have tormented me daily, from thinking about her beautiful body to her words. Her words about how the blood running through my veins has destroyed her life. I’ve tried so hard to move on, but I can’t. Now I’m home and I have no clue what’s next for us. If there still is an “us.” I have no control when it comes to Addison, and I hate it.
I take in a deep breath, shaking my thoughts from my head, bringing me back to the present. I look at the lady still arguing and now asking for a manager. Looking around to see if there’s a shorter line, but not finding one, I drop my head onto my arms that rest on the cart.
Don’t pull out your gun and shoot her, I say to myself. I just want to go home and sleep.
My head bolts up at the sound of screams and then gunfire. Panic fills the air with more screams and people rushing to the exit doors. I pull my gun out and instruct everyone to get out. The cashier looks at me with a deer in the headlight look. “Go, now!” I growl. He nods and dashes out with everyone else.
