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He cringes slightly. “Between the pain and the way I can sense your… urges—it was very difficult to get anything done.”
Tris must feel me preparing to apologize because his scent smolders slightly. “Don’t apologize for that, omega,” he murmurs. “If I hadn’t been fighting myself every step of the way, I would have loved that part.”
That part; because the other part is some worse version of this pulling, pinching pain.
“Tristan,” I whisper. “Why didn’t you tell me how badly this was harming you? I never would have let you hurt like this.”
He gathers me into his side and kisses my forehead. “That’s exactly why I didn’t want to tell you, sweet one, or let you into my half of the bond. My pain was never your burden. It’s the consequence of what I did. I never wanted you to feel pressured to complete the bond because of guilt.”
And I want to argue with him… but I already see his point. Because I don’t feel quite ready to bite him, but the impulse is there, thick enough to block the air from reaching my lungs.
I know I’m going to complete this bond, now, right? So what’s the harm in doing it today? Putting him out of this misery?
But Tristan feels everything I do now, and an answering flare of outrage fires in his gut.
“No,” he barks quietly. “Absolutely not. If you want to complete the bond, we’ll do it during your heat, when you’re ready. Not randomly. And never because you’re worried about me. I’ll be fine.”
It isn’t a lie because he believes it. But I sense the doubt lurking underneath his optimism. The fear.
He refuses to lose me by keeping me.
But will that mean I lose him?
chapter
fifty-nine
*The Dumbest Assholes Alive*
Tristan
How is our omega today?
She woke me up at dawn and kept me in bed until I had to leave at nine.
Has she needed more?
Spencer
I took her for two hours after you left.
She’s with Jonah now.
Avery
if I wasn’t about to murder you all, I’d be impressed
Jonah
water.
Spencer
Serena needs water?
Jonah
NO I NEED WATER
