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His words hit me harder than his body did. They’re sharp little daggers, flicked right into my diaphragm. Each one dribbles cold poison down into my abdomen.
He never wanted to knot me. Didn’t intend to ever lower himself to this level.
It hurts. And I’m surprised. Partly because… how can I really be shocked after everything he’s done? Especially after tonight.
But to hear him say he never wanted to be this close to me, while he’s still in me…
My throat closes while tears sting the bridge of my nose. “I—Okay. I’m sorry.”
I close my eyes, not wanting to witness the disgust in his once he sees me crying over him. He mumbles another curse. The fingers resting against my crown tighten around a clump of hair.
“Shit. Fuck. Meg? Don’t cry. Stop crying.”
The bark hits me, but it backfires. The swell of panic from not being able to follow his command on the spot just pushes out more tears. His voice jumps up an octave. “No! I didn’t mean to bark. You can cry. I don’t care.”
He doesn’t care.
It’s the truth, isn’t it?
For weeks, I deluded myself into thinking he might come around, twisting all of his words and actions to give myself some scrap of hope. But he’s gone and made things crystal clear, now.
Why doesn’t he just stab me in the heart next time? It will be quicker and a lot less messy than this.
I squeeze my eyes shut, sobbing soundlessly into the back of my hand while he tugs at my hair and growls some more.
“No! Shit! I mean, of course I care! I guess. A little, okay? Obviously. Obviously, I fucking care! You happy? You whined once and now we’re literally locked together. Your scent electrocutes my fucking soul. And I’ve been basically hiding from you in my own home because I was terrified I would go into a rut and hurt you. So, yeah, okay, I care. But please. Stop crying.”
I try to. I gasp and struggle to stop the tears. They only come harder, raining down into my sweat-crusted hair.
After a long moment, Declan sighs, his body deflating on top of mine. He uses the motion to rock us into a quick roll, putting himself beneath me and gathering my wet face against his throat.
“Hey.” His voice is warmer. Soft. “Shh, it’s okay. You’re okay.”
My confusion makes me cry harder. He wraps his solid arms around my entire torso, cupping the back of my head with gentle pets. “I’m here. I have you.”
At first, I think he clears his throat. Then I hear it—the quiet, unsteady threads of a hesitant purr. I rub my cheek between his pecs, trying to get closer. Hear it better.
He immediately gets louder, the raspy rattle rising up into me. I whimper and his lips graze my forehead. “Is that good, baby?”
His fingers clamp around the back of my neck and begin kneading the muscles. His purr gets deeper and stronger until I’m fairly sure he’s the loudest of all the alphas in the pack.
I feel like my brain is unplugged. Almost like it isn’t there at all.
My body reacts without consultation. All sorts of omega nonsense comes up. Whines, whimpers. I nestle closer and closer, scent-marking him, kissing his neck.
Declan doesn’t flinch. He holds me hard and purrs so steadily. By the time I realize my face is dry, I’m half-asleep, floating in knotted, vibrating bliss.
The alpha under me starts fussing with my hair, his fingers untangling, smoothing it down. The longer we lie together, the more he relaxes, the muscles beneath me slowly losing their rigid tension. When his shoulders drop back to the mat, he hisses.
I catch the way his electric eyes flicker to the left, a vaguely annoyed pout tugging at his lips. A realization hits me.
“You’re hurt.”
Declan instantly stiffens all over again. His teeth snap together. “I’m fine.”
But my crazy omega ass can’t take him at his word. Low-grade panic tingles through my stomach, turning it into a sick seethe. And I know—I know—he’s lying to me. And himself, probably.
My hand flies up. He tries to shift away, but there’s nowhere for him to go with my body on top of his and his knot holding us together. I find the injury about an inch south of the place where his left shoulder meets his nape, my fingers gently probing the muscle and sinew. It’s hot, like the tissue inside is throbbing with painful inflammation.
