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“Mexico? Don’t tell me you two have eloped.” The genuine alarm in her voice told me that was exactly what she’d thought.
My heart clenched and a tinge of sadness settled there. Nothing would have pleased me more than if James proposed to me, but I resigned myself to him feeling contented with our living arrangements as they were.
“I don’t think marriage is in the cards for us,” I replied quietly. But as matter-of-fact as I’d wanted those words to sound, I heard the disappointment in my tone. My throat constricted and I swallowed down my emotions.
“Nonsense, he worships you, Tricia.”
“James isn’t Sawyer,” I retorted by way of an argument.
“What’s that supposed to mean? Yeah, Sawyer asked me within a couple of months, but I’d have to be blind to miss the way James looks at you… the way he protects you. That man adores you—I take it he’s not in earshot—or you’d have closed my conversation down after my eloping comment.”
“He’s taking a shower, but he knows you’re on the phone,” I mumbled, cupping my hand over the cell and glancing toward the bathroom door. The distance from the deck to the bathroom appeared too far for him to hear much.
“Oh, God,” she blurted. “Maybe he’s going to propose this weekend?” My heart skittered erratically at the thought.
“I don’t think—”
“Oh. My. God. That’s it. He’s taken you to Mexico to propose,” she squealed excitedly.
“Billie,” I warned.
“I’m so excited for you. First Erin and now this. Think about it, Tricia. Sun, sultry nights, fabulous sunsets, and the food … he knows Mexican food is your favorite.”
“You’re getting carried away,” I replied, as James opened the bedroom door and came back through the living room toward the deck. “James is out of the shower I need to go… and I’m turning my phone off until we get back.”
“Call me as soon as he’s done it, I want details.”
“Bye, Billie, love to Sawyer and the kids,” I replied, ignoring her last comment and hung up.
“What’s Billie getting carried away about?” James asked. My gaze turned to him, my hungry eyes immediately scanning the length of his naked body.
“Oh, that holiday Sawyer spoke to us about—you know Billie—planning like a demon.” James chuckled accepting my lie and continued drying himself. I felt awful lying, but what was I supposed to have said? Telling him the truth would have meant putting him on the spot and placing myself in a sticky situation.
If Billie hadn’t called, I’d have been blissfully happy during that few days away, but her comments set me on edge, and as such, every time we had a quiet romantic moment I had wondered if that was the moment he’d ask me to be his wife.
Each time the moment passed, and he hadn’t, I’d been left disappointed to the point that by the time we’d slid into bed on the last night, I had fresh feelings of doubt that he would ever propose to me.
“Are you anxious about going home?” James asked, as he ordered two coffees from the coffee shop at the airport.
“No, why?”
“You seem …” He hesitated, and my heart sank to my stomach that my mood had let me down. “I don’t know,” he shrugged. “Snippy?” he replied, as we shuffled along the counter to wait for our drinks to be made.
“Snippy?” I snapped, hearing exactly what he meant and quickly adjusting my tone. I could hardly tell him I was disappointed I was only his girlfriend. Glancing up at him, I tried to hide my true feelings by giving him a small smile. “Oh,” I sighed, measuring my words. “I suppose I’m a little anxious about going home. I’ve had such an amazing time here alone with you; going back to reality is going to feel a bit depressing.
Pulling me close he kissed my temple, then retrieved our drink tray, and turned to find us somewhere to sit. As I followed behind him, staring at his broad back, another wave of doubt came over me and I felt suddenly scared I’d lose him.
I tried hard to shake it off as I sat down, but my heart pinched when I looked into his trusting eyes. I’d felt happy until I’d taken Billie’s call and had dared to hope James would ask me to marry him because he had been unable to resist me.
Chapter Six
The first couple of weeks back from Mexico had felt hectic, James had been leading a merger of some kind at his office, so that had given me the opportunity to get ahead with some accounts of my own at work.
Erin and I continued with our regular lunches every few days when I was in New York and we enjoyed the time we shared. I’d missed her whole life up until those short weeks before, but with each meeting we had, the past became less of a barrier for either of us.
Even though James had been drowning in work, he’d had someone set up a luxury spa day for Erin as her birthday treat, and on the morning of my birthday I had found a beautiful Tiffany diamond necklace on my pillow after he’d left for work. But no gift was as precious to me as the sensitivity he had around my mood swings. The message I had gotten from his caring and compassionate attention was that he was as committed as ever to keeping that special connection we had between us.
Everything had felt right again, and since Mexico I’d made a conscious decision not to dwell on James’ lack of legal commitment to our arrangement and concentrate on the blessings that I had: a wonderful man who loved me and a positive relationship with my daughter.
