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Her eyes flutter opened, and he stepped back, making her arms drop from around him.
“That is not something I should test. I’m sorry.”
Her shoulders relaxed as she took a step back. “It’s fine. But to answer your question, I do... think that you could have a relationship with someone one day.” She met his gaze and took a step closer. Slowly, she lifted her hand and rubbed her thumb down his cheek. It took a great amount of effort not to flinch, though he felt no pain.
The new sensation rippled through him like crawling into cool sheets on a warm summer night.
“But I don’t think you’re there yet.”
He frowned and searched her eyes for answers.
“I think we went about things very wrong this week.”
He raised a brow. “Yeah? Does that mean we are done with experimenting?”
“Only if you want to be. But I have an idea of how to get you closer to that goal without having to touch multiple people. Are you willing to take a test away from work?”
He gave a hesitant nod. “If it means I don’t have to shake hands or interact with people constantly, I’m all in. What is it?”
She took a step back, then, and headed to the fountain for her bag. He reluctantly followed. “This would break any physical barrier you have, but you’d have to want to put in the work for the healing to happen.”
“Okay.” He swallowed the tight knot of worry building in his throat.
“Tomorrow, I’d like to take you to my taekwondo class.”
He gulped and pictured someone grabbing him, even pinning him down. He leaned forward. “I can’t even hold your hand without overthinking every touch of your fingers.”
“You wouldn’t have time to overthink things,” she said, leaning forward as well.
Their faces were inches apart, and he forced himself not to flinch.
“Please, Jason? Don’t you want to overcome everything and have a real relationship?”
His gaze fell to her lips again, and the desire to kiss her returned. Next time he didn’t want to chicken out. He wanted to take her in his arms and hold her. But he was too scared of what might happen, what he might do. Feelings were easily hurt, and even pushing her hand away caused disappointment. More than anything, he wanted a relationship with someone. No, not just someone. With Hannah. And to do that—
He knew she was right. It was time to move away from his comfort zone and force himself to become physical.
“All right,” he said, reaching for her hand. “I’ll do it. But... if I can’t overcome this, what then?”
She shook her head. “That won’t happen. You and I are the strong-willed type, and I think you’re... motivated enough to make it happen.”
His gaze fell to her lips a third time. Yes, he certainly was motivated.
14
Hannah
“No, no, no. Stop moving around like a jumping monkey.”
Hannah winced as Sabum reprimanded Jason again. The taekwondo instructor’s voice was soft, but Hannah knew from experience that enduring Sabum’s disappointment was humiliating enough without his words. Her parents had started her in taekwondo when she was eight, and she was still going strong twenty years later.
Since Jason’s lesson was private, she could only sit behind the one-sided glass window and watch. The first few lessons had been easy enough because Jason hadn’t had to touch anyone. His arms were stronger than she had imagined, and despite his lack of training, he’d caught on quickly. His kicks weren’t as high as hers, but in just a few lessons, he had shown he had the muscle and concentration to do well. If only he did better with partner work.
As soon as he was asked to touch, kick, or grab another person, Jason lost concentration and was incapable of doing it.
Sabum had recommended he come in every day after work until he adjusted. A few days ago, Jason had moved home since his repairs had been completed, and she only saw him at work. She missed him. Having a view to his lessons from behind a one-way mirror seemed like cheating, but Sabum told her it was essential to his growing independent of her.
So, there she was, watching as he squirmed away whenever Sabum reached for him. No matter what he was asked to do, he was incapable of doing it, and she could see his confidence slipping.
