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They both nodded, and Stella said, “That could be it, then. As teammates, they would have made sure your mother got an official letter, and not just her letter returned unopened. Those boys were all like brothers.”
“Do you know what they gave her?” Ty asked.
“No, but if not the letters, whatever it was could very well be in the boxes I have back at my place in Texas. I haven’t gone through them all yet.”
Stella reached for my hand. “Take your time going through them, sweetheart. It’s okay not to want to do it all at once. Now…let me show you something.”
She and Ty both stood, so I followed. We left his office and made our way through the house and to the stairs.
“Um, Stella, Ty, there’s something you should know,” Dirk said as he quickly approached us.
“In a moment, sweetheart,” Stella said as she started up the steps, Ty following. I turned to Dirk, and he gave me a concerned look. I started to ask him what was wrong, but Stella called out for me.
“Beck, are you coming, dear?”
“Um, yes, ma’am. I’m right behind you.”
I shrugged, and before Dirk could say anything, I turned and took the steps two at a time to catch up. I could hear him cursing behind me.
There was a large loft area that looked out over the family room below. I glanced down and saw Dirk looking back at me. He was trying to say something, but I couldn’t tell what it was.
“What?” I mouthed. He rolled his eyes, and I jumped when Stella called me again.
“Beck! Good Lord, the apple didn’t fall far from the tree,” she sighed.
I couldn’t help but smile. I shrugged to Dirk once more and quickly caught up to Stella and Ty as they got to the end of a long hallway. They stood at a closed door, and I assumed it was a bedroom. When Stella opened it, she motioned for me to go inside first.
The second I stepped in, my knees nearly buckled out from under me. It was my father’s room. I looked around in awe, and then back to Stella and Ty.
“We never could pack up his things and get rid of them. Something deep inside of me told me to hang onto everything.”
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I walked over to a bookcase. Bending down, I looked at the spines. Baseball books, bull-riding books…books about cattle and other ranching topics. There was a Marine Corps book, as well as some classic literature titles. To Kill a Mockingbird, The Great Gatsby, Brave New World, The Call of the Wild, and so many more. There was even Pride and Prejudice.
My finger ran along the spines. “He had good taste in books.”
“He did, indeed,” Stella stated as she sat down on the bed.
On top of the case were a few baseball trophies, a belt buckle for something he won, and a few movie ticket stubs. I picked one up and laughed. “Top Gun.”
“Lord, he loved that movie,” Ty said with a laugh. “He loved any kind of military movie.”
Turning in a slow circle, I took in the rest of the room. There was a poster on the back of the door of some model hardly dressed in anything. In the corner was a record player, and under it, vinyl records. I made my way over to them.
Stella spoke, and I could hear the smile in her voice. “He loved all kinds of music.”
I pulled out a Van Halen record. 1984.
With a slow shake of my head, I slid it back in and pulled out a Boston album. It felt like someone was squeezing my heart as I stared at the cover. My mother had the same album, and she’d played it over and over until it wore out. Closing my eyes, I could still hear the words to “More Than a Feeling.”
Letting out a slow breath, I opened my eyes and put the record back. I grabbed another, and instantly the tears stung the back of my eyes. “Silver Springs,” I softly whispered.
I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I lost the battle to keep my tears at bay. Stella was suddenly next to me, and she drew me into a hug.
“Shh, it’s okay, sweetheart. Let it all out. It’s okay to miss her.”
I wasn’t even sure how Stella knew I was crying over my mother. Then again, could I cry over a father I never knew?
I buried my face in her neck and let myself cry for the first time since the night my mother died. With each tear fallen and each sob released, the pressure around my heart eased.
Stella’s hand rubbed lightly over my back as she softly spoke to me. When I finally got my shit together, I drew back. “I’m so sorry.”
