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“I feel better. We’re going to start filming in a week.” I rest my chin on the back of my hands as I lie on my front on the bed, watching her on my laptop screen.
“Nothing more from Jet?”
“No, and I hope it stays that way.” I ignore the tension radiating through my chestat his name.
“I can’t believe he started dating her after all you two did together.”
“Don’t.” I swallow down the taste of bile. “I don’t want to think about the things we did.”
“Sorry.” She gives me a small smile.
The rage inside me takes over when I think about it. When I think that I told him things no one else knew. That I trusted him with my heart and my body. I’ve never let another man come inside me before. Yet I let Jet do that thefirsttime, handing everything over to him so willingly. I even begged him for more, greedily taking it all, thinking that even if it was just sex, we at least respected each other.
I’ve never told a soul what he said to me about being scared to love someone. I’ve kept the things that scare him close to me. Protected them.Kept him safe.
He’s shared mine with the world for his own gain.
“David’s a lucky guy,” I say.
Liv’s face lights up. “You know he brought me a plant on our last date? Not flowers like a normal guy… A plant.”
“Uh-huh.” I smile as a dopey grin spreads over my best friend’s face.
“It’s because he’s a landscaper. He likes helping things grow rather than cutting them off when they’re at their most beautiful.”
“That’s almost poetic.”
Liv scrunches her nose up. “What the hell’s happening to me?”
“I think you like him.” I laugh.
“I think I do, too,” she groans like it’s the last thing she wants. “Which sucks, because once I graduate, I don’t want to be held back. I don’t know what I want to do yet, but I want to be free to do it, you know? I mean, look at you! You’re living in LA, making movies, and going to parties with celebrities.”
“You can still do all those things.”
She snorts. “We’ll see. It’s not easy, though. You’ve not been home in almost two months, you’re so busy over there.”
I let out a deep sigh. “I know. And I really miss you and Gramps. I’ll come back for a visit as soon as I can.”
“It’s fine.” She matches my sigh with a soft smile. “If you’re happy, that’s all that matters. Maybe I can come to you? I can pick up William and we’ll fly over together. When was the last time he had a vacation?”
“He—” I frown as I wrack my brain. “We went away to Cornwall before I left for university.”
“Caravan sites are not vacations.” Liv scoffs.
“The site had a pool,” I argue.
“If you say so.” She rolls her eyes. “Listen, Bitch. I love you, but I have to go. David will be here in ten minutes.”
“I love you, too. Have fun.” I blow her a kiss and hang up.
I roll onto my back and stare at the ceiling. When did Gramps last go on a proper vacation? I don’t think he’s been on a plane since we lost Dad.
He was always there for me when I needed him.
Guilt pulls low in my stomach. I bring up his number and press call. We’ve spoken every day, sometimes twice since I went to stay with Magnus. But I haven’t seen him in almost two months. I haven’t hugged him.
His phone rings out, so I leave a message and hang up. It beeps as soon as I’m done. My heart plummets as I click into the text message.
