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I turned to leave, but couldn’t shake the sense of regret that gnawed at my insides. The knowledge that I had hurt Stephanie with my sudden change in demeanor. But I knew it was for the best. I couldn’t afford to let my emotions cloud my judgment—not when so much was at stake. With a heavy heart, I walked away, leaving Stephanie behind in the quiet solitude of the ranch.
7
STEPHANIE
Ikept up my work on the ranch that day, but my mind relived the unexpected kiss I had shared with Ashlyn. The memory was like a flickering flame, dancing at the edges of my consciousness.
It refused to be extinguished, despite my best effort to focus on the tasks at hand. I knew I should be thinking about Phantom and about how well he had responded to Ashlyn as a rider.
About the progress they made together.
Instead, all I could remember was how Ashlyn’s lips had felt against mine—soft and warm. How it had felt when her tongue pressed into my mouth. Oh, I wanted that again, and so much more. A fleeting moment of intimacy had left me breathless and wanting more. With a sigh, I shook my head, trying to banish the memory from my mind. This was no time for daydreams and distractions, not when there was so much work to be done on the ranch.
But try as I might, I couldn’t shake the feeling of longing that tugged at my heartstrings, my desire to be near Ashlyn once more. To feel her touch and to taste her kiss. As I tended to the horses, my movements were mechanical, my thoughts consumed by the memory of our stolen moment of passion. I could feel a blush creeping into my cheeks as I replayed the kiss in my mind, each sensation seared into my memory with crystal clarity.
But amid the swirl of emotions that threatened to overwhelm me, there was a small voice of reason, reminding me of the risks of getting involved with Ashlyn. I knew the dangers all too well—the potential for heartache, for betrayal, for loss. And yet I couldn’t deny the pull of attraction that drew me to her.
I wondered for a second if I was just one of many. If that was the effect she had on women. I had known women like her before, in the army. Of course I had. We all know a lesbian like her. Effortlessly charming. Strikingly beautiful, with a smile that melts hearts. All the women want her, of course they do. And she wants (and takes) all of them. Then she leaves a trail of broken hearts behind her.
I certainly did not want to be one of a trail of broken hearts, that was for sure.
Yet, here was someone who excited me in a way that I hadn’t felt in so many years. Would it be so wrong to pursue that?
With a shake of my head, I forced myself to focus on the present, pushing aside the lingering thoughts of Ashlyn’s kiss. There would be time enough for contemplation later, time enough to unravel the mysteries of my heart. But for now, there were horses to tend to, chores to be done, and a ranch to run.
I made my way up to the house, my thoughts still swirling with memories of our kiss, finding myself faced with the practical realities. Melody was waiting for me in the kitchen, a stack of paperwork spread out on the table before her.
“Hey, Steph,” she greeted me with a warm smile. “I’ve got everything ready for Ashlyn’s paperwork.”
I nodded, taking a seat opposite her as she began to explain the details of the arrangement we had agreed upon for Ashlyn’s employment. As Melody spoke, I couldn’t help but feel a pang of unease at the thought of bringing someone new onto the ranch, especially someone as enigmatic and unpredictable as Ashlyn.
But despite my reservations, I knew that Ashlyn’s expertise could be just what Phantom needed. And if it meant putting aside my own misgivings for the sake of the horse, then I was willing to do whatever it took.
As Melody outlined the terms of Ashlyn’s employment, I couldn’t help but notice the absence of any references or paperwork from Ashlyn herself. It seemed strange, given the importance of such
documentation in a professional setting. However, I pushed aside my concerns, trusting my gut instinct that Ashlyn was the right choice for the job.
Phantom had kicked off in the way he was so prone to when things didn’t go exactly his way. His whole body had twisted as he bucked and leapt and I knew for a fact had it been me in his saddle at that time he would have thrown me off again. I was far too old for falling off horses. My right hip still ached with the memory of last time. But the way Ashlyn had been on him, her beautiful athletic body sitting easily aboard him, moving with him, adjusting her balance constantly to stay in motion with him. She was a calm and quiet rider- there was no harsh discipline for Phantom, just a quiet welcome for him when he calmed down and Ashlyn was still there- completely unphased. Her face looked just as calm as ever and that passed down to the horse. Horses sense things in people. Phantom especially.
“Everything looks good,” I said, forcing a smile as I signed my name on the dotted line. “Let’s hope Ashlyn feels the same way.”
Melody nodded, her brow furrowed with worry. “I’m just not sure about the pay, Steph,” she admitted, her voice tinged with concern. “It’s not much, and Ashlyn might not be willing to accept it.”
I sighed, knowing that she was right. The salary we were offering was far from generous, especially given Ashlyn’s reputation as a renowned horse trainer. But it was the best I could afford. I sensed that Ashlyn had her reasons for wanting to move out here and I figured money wasn’t the motivator.
“We’ll just have to wait and see,” I said with a shrug, trying to sound more confident than I felt. “If Ashlyn is as passionate about horses as she seems, then hopefully she’ll understand that this is about more than just money.”
I stirred from sleep, my heart still racing from the vivid dream that had consumed me. I found that I was bathed in a sheen of sweat, my breath coming in shallow gasps. The memory of Ashlyn’s kiss lingered on my lips, and the sensation still tingled against my skin as if it had been real.
I sat up in bed, disoriented and flustered, trying to shake off the remnants of the dream that had felt so achingly real. In the darkness of my room, I could still feel the warmth of Ashlyn’s touch, the weight of her lips against mine, and I couldn’t help the surge of longing that rose up within my chest.
But once the fog of sleep began to lift, reality came crashing back down upon me. It was a harsh reminder of the boundaries that existed between us. I knew that what I had imagined in my dream could never be—a fleeting moment of passion, a stolen kiss in the darkness of night.
With a sigh, I pushed aside the tangled sheets and swung my legs over the edge of the bed, the cool air of the room washing over me like a balm. I knew that dwelling on my dreams would only lead to trouble.
With a shake of my head, I forced myself to focus on the present, pushing aside the fantasies that danced at the edges of my consciousness. There would be time enough for contemplation later,
time enough to unravel the mysteries of my heart. But for now, I had a ranch to run.
