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“Running away won't make me stop asking about him!” Devon shouts to my back. I know she isn't going to drop this. It’s not in her nature to let things go. She pokes and prods until you lose your shit and spill all of your secrets.
I’ve never been more thankful to have my own apartment than I am right now. Nixon Russo isn't something I can deal with while others watch. Just hearing his name feels like a bucket of ice-cold water has been poured over my head. So many emotions rush over me. Anger, excitement, and nervousness are the biggest ones.
He disappeared from my life without a backwards glance and now he thinks he can just pop back in with a ‘Hey, how are you?’, I don’t think so. I’m going to teach Nixon Russo a lesson if it’s the last thing I do.
Chapter 2
Nixon
Pacing back and forth in my childhood room, I check my phone for what has to be the hundredth time in the last two minutes.
According to my phone, Savannah read my text. She read it, but she isn’t responding to me and that speaks volumes.
I thought having time away from her would help. The whole 'time and space heals all wounds' and shit like that.
I made stupid decisions where she’s concerned and I’ll regret them for the rest of my life. I was embarrassed, self-conscious, and I didn’t want her to know how my life changed.
Savannah never wanted me to join the military. She wanted me to stay home and go to college locally, but I knew that wouldn’t work for me. Not back then. I didn’t know what I wanted in life, but I knew I wasn’t a man who deserved someone like her. I was so in love with her, yet I refused to tell her until I proved I was the type of man she wanted.
But then I got injured and I cut off all contact with her.
I thought the time away would let me get my head on straight. I thought I could come back and easily fix things between Sav and I. I could’ve come home sooner, but after I found out she moved away for college, I thought it was better for me to stay where I was and to heal a little more. To get stronger before I begged her for forgiveness.
I know she’ll be graduating soon so I decided to pick up my life and move back to my hometown, all to try to win back my best friend. But I don’t want her as a friend anymore. I want her as so much more.
Savvy: I'm good, Nixon. Really good. Happy. How are you?
Her words are like a knife to my chest. I know Savannah better than I know myself. What she’s really saying is ‘I’m good without you, happy without you’. And that just doesn’t sit well with me.
I groan, running my hands through my long hair. I haven’t had it this long in years. But I can’t cut it now. Savvy always loved it long. She said I had great hair and it’d be a sin to keep it short. So, I started growing it out as soon as I thought about coming back.
This conversation feels too casual for us, too small talk-ish. We never small talked, every conversation was deep, emotional, and honest. We didn’t know how to do surface stuff, but now, that’s all we have.
Nixon: I’m great. Your mom says you’re coming home for Thanksgiving?
Expecting her to take a long time to respond again, I jump in the shower to keep myself from checking the phone every half a second. I never thought a girl could twist me up like this, but I'm a ball of nerves right now.
The second shampoo touches my hair, a ping fills the air. Of course. Why wouldn’t she respond almost immediately when I can't get to the phone? I rush through the rest of my shower routine. As soon as I'm done, I wrap a towel around my hips and race to my phone as fast as I can. Not giving a single fuck that I'm trailing water everywhere.
Savvy: I am. Will you be there?
A smile breaks across my face. I wasn’t sure if Carla had talked to her yet. I was a little worried Sav would change her mind and stay at school if she knew I was home.
Nixon: Definitely. It isn’t a holiday without the Catalino family.
Savvy: It’s been eight years since you celebrated a holiday with the Catalino Family. I guess you did fine without us.
One curse after another falls from my lips. She’s right. I can't even argue with that, but I want to. I want to beg her to forgive me, beg her to give me another chance. Beg her to understand what happened.
Nixon: I wasn’t fine. I missed you, Savvy.
Savvy: No one calls me that anymore.
Nixon: I do.
My fingers fly across the screen as fast as I can. I want to keep her talking to me. If I give her any sort of break in the conversation, she’ll go back to taking a while to respond. I didn’t realize how much I wanted, needed, to talk to her until she answered me.
Savvy: Exactly. No one.
