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"And what about you? Have you been with anyone else since your break?" I ask, not sure what I want her answer to be.
Does it matter?
Either way we're done before we ever started.
"No, you're the first and I swear I didn't think anything was going to happen between us but then you kissed me in the parking lot and things just escalated. You've been avoiding me ever since I got here. It's not like you've put in an effort to get to know me over breakfast. I never thought we'd end up here," she says, motioning to the bed.
She's right—we don't know anything about each other. I can't blame her for not telling me before the kiss. My intentions from the moment she showed up on my porch were to not get to know her. She didn't owe me her life story. But she had time between the kiss outside of Scallywag's and the drive back to my place, where we spent the night together.
"You could have said something when I pinned you against the building and asked you how far I could go."
She nods slowly.
"I'm sorry. You took me off guard. I thought I was nothing more than a nuisance to you until you kissed me out front. Then everything happened so fast and being in your arms felt so good. I should have found a way to tell you before we took it any further tonight. But it's been over eight years since I've had an orgasm—"
She stops immediately when she realizes what she just admitted. She and I both look at each other with equal looks of shock on our faces.
"Did you just say that you haven't had an orgasm in eight years? How is that physically possible?"
She looks down at her hands and folds them together nervously in her lap.
"I shouldn't have told you that. It's not relevant to our situation, but my agent booked me on this trip to finish my manuscript and to find someone to have a fling with during my breakup to see if maybe…"
"If maybe your incompetent ex-fiancé is the reason why you're not getting off," I say, finishing her sentence.
Or at least finish it the way it should have ended.
How in the hell does a man you've been with for eight years not know how to give you an orgasm?
The better question is, why would she have agreed to marry someone like that in the first place?
"It's not his fault. I had a traumatic experience years ago during a tornado that ripped through our college campus, and ever since then, I haven't been able to get off without sex aids," she covers her face after she blurts it out. "I didn't mean to tell you that either."
What the hell is happening to me? I've never given any other woman this much time to explain her situation to me but the more she tells me, the more complicated her situation is becoming.
She pulls her phone up and opens it.
I look to find her almost in tears.
"See. I swear I'm not lying to you."
She turns her phone around for me to see the illuminated screen.
Fiancé: The woman here means nothing to me but it's too late to kick her out of the apartment and she's already asleep. It would be an asshole thing to do.
Fiance: And you can't be mad at me; we agreed to sleep with other people. And you know that I need this. I need reassurance that it's not my fault that you can't orgasm during sex. And now that I know I'm not the one to blame, and I can commit to a lifetime with you.
I just about grab her phone and huck it out my bedroom window, but this isn't my relationship; it's hers. I've already had a manipulative ex who dumped me. Thankfully she did it before it was too late and I was locked in for life. Josslin did me a favor in the end. However, it cost me my entire family in the process.
Brynn's ex has a firm enough pull on her to convince her to let him fuck his way through Australia and keep her on the hook until he gets home. And that the asshole is blaming her for something that should be a team effort. I'm not sure how to feel about this situation anymore.
Then, my stomach turns uncomfortably when a question comes to mind.
"I need you to be honest," I ask her.
"I'll tell you anything you want to know as long as you keep talking to me."
I can't promise that I'll keep talking. It's not my strong suit, but I haven't walked away yet.
