Page 44 of Dare You To Love Me


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“Be careful on the boulders,” Joan said, lacing her fingers with mine. “Use the light from your phone.”

I gave nothing away that I knew a tiny bit about what had happened tonight. I figured it wouldn’t go over well unless Matthias was the one to tell them. So I wordlessly allowed her to drag me over to the other side.

Navigating the boulders wasn’t that difficult sober but I imagined it might be tough when inebriated. I noticed the black rope strung along the footpath and figured it was there to hold onto if in the event you were unsure of your footing.

On the other side, a large bonfire illuminated all the attendees. I guessed a good thirty or forty people were in the cove, with more arriving, given the steady beam of headlights shotgunning down the access road.

Some partiers were dancing, others were standing around the fire, singing, talking, strumming guitars.

Music came from a portable speaker attached to someone’s phone. Coolers full of wine, beer, sodas, and water were behind the bonfire. Someone was mixing drinks and sure enough, I noticed red cups and clear cups. Joan handed me a clear cup.

I sniffed it and it singed my nostrils. I took a tiny sip.

The liquid burned as it slid down my throat.

“Good God.” I coughed. “What is this?” I yelled to Joan over the music.

“It’s a Cove secret, my friend.” Joan drank from one of the red cups, and started dancing, moving with the music. “It offers a slower passage to oblivion.”

“Is that a place?” I asked.

Joan’s nose crinkled adorably. “No, my friend. It’s a state of being.”

Wind blew in from the ocean. I could feel the incoming storm. It was probably hours away, but it hung heavy in the air, coating my skin and clothes. I felt damp after a few minutes.

“Before I go see Filipe and Matthias, let me introduce you to the crew,” Joan said, dragging me around. I met people named Boogieboard Bob, Lacy Macy, and someone who answered to “guitar gal” because no one knew her actual name.

After a few minutes, Joan was no longer at my side. Looking up, I saw her silhouette traversing the boulders. But everyone she’d introduced me to were talkative and I never once felt uncomfortable. Not with a few alcoholic sips in me.

The ages varied from my age all the way to forty or fifty. Through the bonfire light, I observed expressions to see who watched who. Social butterflies went from group to group. The loners hung out by the booze coolers. Those who danced joined in as desired, and then jumped out when ready.

A brave few frolicked in the water.

Logs and boulders were interspersed across the beach. In the areas where the bonfire light didn’t reach, couples huddled together. I wasn’t interested in invading anyone’s space, so I stayed within the firelight’s reach. Not that I was worried, but I wasn’t interested in someone mistaking me for someone else.

I was on my second cup of the clear cup liquor when my inhibitions were starting to slip. I wasn’t exactly a natural dancer, but I took after my mom in that music and rhythm moved in my soul, so when someone grabbed my hand and pulled me into a dancing throng, I didn’t object.

The music was loud in my head as warm bodies writhed around me, against me. Hands pressed against my back, my chest.

Someone cupped my ass. When someone groped the front of me, a pleasurable throb spread outward from my groin. It wasn’t exactly sexual, but the flare of eroticism spread through my blood, like I was experiencing a new plane of existence.

The fire itself felt like a goddess bestowing her gifts upon me.

Everything felt good, hedonistic. Worry fled into another dimension. Anxiety was pushed through a time warp, becoming a thing of the past.

Someone grabbed my hand and licked my inner wrist, and holy fuck, tingles rippled up my arm and down my body.

“Do that again,” I yelled, not even knowing who did it, but they moved on to someone else.

I don’t know how much time elapsed, but I spotted Matthias in my peripheral vision. He stood away from the dancing group, glaring at me for some reason.

Didn’t he tell me to have fun? Someone should tell him that he’d be sexier if he didn’t glare so much.

He drank from a clear cup while Filipe spoke into his ear. Matthias’s arm was around Filipe’s shoulders, leaning into him. Joan flitted around the group. One second she was dancing with me, the next she was making out with someone.

Was that okay? Was she allowed to make out with someone who wasn’t Filipe?

Oh right, Filipe and Joan—and maybe Matthias?—defied definition. They did their own thing, carefree and joyously. And where was Matthias’s girlfriend?

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