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She beamed up at me when I said, “Much worse.”
Decked in all black, she looked like she was on her way to rob a bank. Her cheesy yet calculating grin could stop a serial killer in their tracks and make them question everything.
Lifting herself on her tiptoes, she hugged me, and kissed my cheek with an audible smack. She smelled of minty lip balm, strawberry gum, and the salty ocean.
“I’d hoped you looked sated and dicked out,” she said, “and you do…but as pale as you are, it’s almost as if you’ve seen a ghost.”
“I literally never know what you’re going to say each time I see you. It’s amazing. Scientists should study you.”
“Aw, thanks, babe.”
“It wasn’t a compliment.”
She winked at me. “And yet I took it as one.”
At least she didn’t press me about the dicking out part so I considered it a win.
With eagle eyes, Joan peered into the backseat to make sure we’d brought the statue, and also maybe to check to see if we hadn’t tied up Drew and brought him with.
She seemed happy about the first and bummed about the second.
At the driver’s side, Matty and Filipe were talking about the meeting tonight with the swim team.
“All set?” Matty asked after they’d broke apart from their obligatory sideways bro-hug.
“Yeah, man,” Filipe said. He wore his usual attire of board shorts, a black tank top, and flip-flops. His bronzed swimmer’s shoulders glimmered in the sunshine. “Got replies from everyone. They’ll be at the guesthouse at eight. Some only agreed to come if you offered food.”
“I’ll order pizza and wings.”
“Good man,” Filipe said in his laid-back manner. “Any word from Zoey?”
“I’ll call her after we’re done here.”
“Sounds good.” Filipe looked over the hood at me. “How’s it hanging, Ciaran?”
The man was succinct and I liked him for it. “It’s all good, thanks, Filipe,” I said.
“No, you’re not good,” Joan contradicted. She whirled on Matty. “What’d you do to make Ciaran look like a haunted man?”
“Why does it mean I did something to him?”
“Listen, Joan,” I started. “I like that you’re protective of me. It’s like you’re my big sister or something, which is cool. Don’t get me wrong. But it’s nothing to get worried about, okay? Matty revealed news that surprised me. It’s still surprising me, but like I said, I’m all good.”
“Bullshit,” Joan said, looking back and forth between us. “Spill the beans.”
Matty sighed. “Apparently there are no secrets between the four of us. Ciaran discovered that there’s no prenup with our parents’ marriage and that my dad will in all likelihood establish a trust fund for him to the tune of ten or twenty million dollars.”
Filipe whistled. “I’d be seeing ghosts, too, my dude. Stefon’s a great man, Ciaran, and I can see how something like that might mess up your head. He’s putting me and many others through college. Been doing that kind of thing for years. It’s not easy to accept gifts of money, but as long as you don’t spend it all on blow and hookers, man, you’re all set.”
That was the most amount of words Filipe had ever said to me. I was near speechless.
“No, it’s all the streaming services that keep jacking up their prices that eat up your inheritance like that,” Joan said, snapping her fingers.
I started laughing. “I will avoid blow, hookers, and streaming services. Anything else?”
Joan grinned at me. “If I know you at all, you’ll end up giving it away. Research it first, okay? Lots of scammers and vultures out there, babe.”
“I will.”
