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It’s one thing to assume Sadie wants that and another to think she’s just saying that to please me. Communication isn’t my strong suit, and having conversations like that isn’t easy for me.
And it’s pretty obvious how much communication is required for something like this.
“Sadie!” I bark, and finally, she jumps, her eyes popping open as she stares up at me in shock.
“What are you doing here?” she asks.
When she rolls onto her back, the thin tank top of her pajamas shifts, and her breast slips out of the top. Quickly, I turn away and rid the image of her pretty pink nipple from my memory.
“It’s past nine, and your appointment is in an hour,” I say, keeping my tone steady.
“Oh shit,” she replies with a groan.
I leave the room as she crawls out of bed, but before I leave, I think about making a remark about the mess in her room or the fact that she should really set an alarm on her phone, but when I glance back, I notice just how defeated she appears, so I decide to save it for another time.
Going into the kitchen, I keep myself busy by fixing some breakfast. I ate mine two hours ago, but I don’t have a class on my schedule today so I have nothing better to do.
When Sadie comes out a few moments later, her hair brushed in long waves and hints of makeup on her face, I place a bowl of granola with fruit and yogurt on the table next to a glass of juice.
“Eat,” I say as I turn away and head back to the kitchen for another cup of coffee.
“I’m not hungry,” she replies, sitting on the couch and slipping on her shoes.
I pause with my back to her and grind my molars together. “I fixed you breakfast, and you shouldn’t be skipping meals. You have time before your appointment. So eat.”
When she gets up from the couch, she doesn’t head toward the dining room like I expect her to. Instead, she fumbles with her hair, clearly frustrated with it, as she stares in the mirror by the front door.
“Miss Green,” I say in a warning. “Did you hear me?”
“Don’t start with me today, Dr. Goode. I’m not in the mood.”
My coffee cup lands loudly on the counter as I stare at her across the house. “I don’t care if you’re in the mood. You will eat breakfast,” I say.
“Ugh!” She grunts in frustration as she starts fidgeting with her shirt, pulling it down to reach the waistband of her skirt, but it’s clearly not to her satisfaction. “Only nine weeks and nothing fits me already! I hate this stupid shirt! And I hate my hair.”
“Miss Green…” I call when I notice her starting to fly off the handle.
She finally rips off her shirt before tearing off her shoes, and I notice her lip starting to tremble.
“Come sit down,” I say again as I make my way into the living room. But it does nothing to stave her breakdown.
“I can’t do this!” she screams. Her face is red, and tears are brimming in her eyes. “I can’t go to this stupid appointment, and I can’t have this baby!”
“Sadie, sit down!” I shout, thinking it will snap her out of her fit.
It doesn’t.
She gapes at me in shock before picking up one of her shoes and sending it hurling toward my head. I manage to dodge it just in time. “Stop yelling at me!” she shouts.
I turn to find the shoe lying on my kitchen counter, and I’m too stunned to move. Turning back toward her, my jaw still hangs open like a fish.
For what feels like minutes, I stand in the middle of the room at a loss for words. Finally, Sadie drops to the floor, her back to the wall as she sobs into her folded arms.
Clenching my jaw and forcing myself to swallow, I make my way slowly toward her. Standing over her, I watch her cry without knowing what I’m supposed to say in this moment. She wanted me to be firm with her and to tell her what to do, but that clearly didn’t work today.
And finally I see what it is she’s feeling. She’s not angry or defiant—she’s scared.
She once said my confidence brings her comfort.
