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Thirteen
Jacey was embarrassed by her behavior and only a little bit mollified that Cade was drawn to her. His words rang through her brain. She could picture him and hear his voice in her head perfectly. Maybe that was because spending time with him was the only solid memories she possessed. Maybe it was because he enthralled her, was taking care of her, she needed him, and she felt he was her perfect fit.
Sweetheart. I’m saying I’ve never been around a woman so enticing in my thirty years and if you don’t march back across the hallway, slam that door, and lock it, maybe shove a dresser in front of it, we’re both going to regret it.
She got chills just thinking of those words in his husky voice and that raw desire in his green eyes. Whew. He was interested in her, no doubt, but he was too honorable to kiss her. He’d regret kissing her if he did. Even worse, he thought kissing her wasn’t honorable because of her memory loss and their situation and had asked her not to ask that of him.
Jacey wanted to call Quaid and ask him to give her chosen bodyguard permission to kiss her any time he wanted.
She smiled as she got ready for bed and lay down. Cade had helped her change out the sheets after they came back from the horseback ride and changed their clothes. She’d almost protested that she wanted the sheets to smell like him. He would have probably thought she was being unsanitary.
She said her prayers, full of thanks for Cade and prayers for her mother to be caught and Quaid and Anna and Quaid’s friends and all the Colevilles and Cade and his family to be safe. She did not pray for her memory to return.
The snippets Quaid had shared were too horrific to comprehend. She was becoming more convinced her poor brain had shut the memories out to give her a respite from her horrific past and family life.
Lying there in Cade’s bed, she was relieved she felt safe and secure. It would not have gone over well if she had stormed into the guest room and told him she was having come-apart number twenty of the day and needed those strong arms around her. She shivered at the thought. He wouldn’t refuse her. She knew he wouldn’t.
Tempted could not begin to describe her thoughts then.
Please help me, she begged heaven above, knowing Cade was right about staying pure and avoiding the tempting situation.
I wouldn’t hang out at the bar if I was an alcoholic.
It struck her as a cute saying, but it typified Cade. He was in control. He was impressive. He was everything she wanted in a man. She thought.
Closing her eyes, she prayed for sleep.
The next morning dawned sunny and bright. Jacey stretched on the comfortable and very large bed. Cade could have slept on the other side and never touched her.
No. She wanted him to touch her.
Movement came from downstairs.
Slipping out of bed, she hurried to dress and rushed downstairs. Cade was not in the main room. She darted toward the mud room where she had left her shoes last night. Cade, dressed in a T-shirt and jeans, was slipping on his cowboy boots when she burst in.
“Whoa!” Cade reared back and stood, grasping her arms with his palms. “Everything okay, sw … Jacey?”
“Yes.” She wished he had added the sweetheart. “I don’t want you to leave me.” She didn’t like revealing her vulnerability.
“I won’t leave you,” he pledged, his hands firm and warm on her arms. “I was hoping you could sleep in and get your rest while I did the morning chores.”
“No. Please. I want to be by your side.”
He smiled gently at her, his thumbs trailing across her bare skin and her stomach hopping. His smile disappeared. “Did you not sleep? Were you afraid in the night?” He pushed out a heavy breath. “If you need me to sleep on the floor, I can. I didn’t mean to intone that I have no self-control.”
Jacey stared into his green eyes, tempted. She would admit how deeply she needed him, not on the floor but holding her close. She would cuddle into the muscles of his chest and sleep as if she were on a cloud.
“I know you have self-control,” she said. Obviously. He had resisted kissing her multiple times yesterday. She’d feared he didn’t want to kiss her, but then he’d admitted last night that was not it at all. “I slept fine,” she admitted. “I wasn’t afraid.”
“Oh.” He appeared a little disappointed as well. He released her and said, “Do you want to eat or drink something? I can do the feeding and then come back in and make a big breakfast.”
“I’m good. I will stick next to you like glue.”
“All right.” His smile returned, and she looked forward to this day with him.
The day was almost perfect. They did chores. They made each meal, ate and cleaned up together, then went on a long horseback ride, a long walk, and he taught her how to shoot. Unfortunately, she was all right at it and there was no call for him to wrap his arms around her and steady her like she had envisioned.
She didn’t break down in tears once or stress often about her evil mother coming to retrieve her and hurt Cade. She was able to talk to Quaid on the phone. Quaid was short on time so they didn’t get into more details from her past. He admitted he had mixed feelings about her memory returning. Their childhood and teenage years had been horrific, and maybe it was a blessing she couldn’t remember. She wondered if she was repressing the memories somehow. Neither of them knew what the right path was. They did pray together before he hung up, and she appreciated that.
