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Undeterred, I kissed his cheek, then traced down his neck with a slow lick and a gentle bite.
He groaned softly, gripping my hair firmly. “Why, Sofiya?”
I bit my lip, afraid to say the three words I wanted to say.
“Ty svodish’ menya s uma. You drive me crazy,” he muttered, releasing his grip on my hair.
Our eyes locked, my heart pounding in my chest.
The truth sat on the tip of my tongue, but fear kept me silent.
How could I articulate the jumble of emotions he had unleashed in me?
How could I convey that his presence had completely upended my life?
It was all so tangled and difficult to put into words.
I let out a shaky breath. “Ask me again.”
He scoffed, clearly frustrated.
Running a hand through his hair, he paced away from me towards the terrace window. He swung it open, stepping outside and leaning on the railing with his head bowed.
A part of me feared I had pushed him too far this time. Minutes dragged on like hours as I sat down on my couch, staring at his back.
Summoning courage, I finally joined him on the terrace, where the New York night lights glowed around us.
“Volk, I?—”
“Call me Volk again “and I’ll make sure to fuck you so hard right here so that every damn person in this shitty city will know my real name.”
He pivoted towards me, his biceps taut as his arms crossed over his chest, his eyes locked onto mine with a daring challenge.
The tension between us was thick, suffocating, and I could feel the rush of adrenaline coursing through my veins.
“I dare you,” he added.
I swallowed hard, my chest tight.
I knew I wasn’t that brave.
“I’m the product of an innocent baby’s death and the schemes of three evil people. How can you just overlook all of that? What if I end up like my mother and do those terrible things? What if?—”
“You’re nothing like Victoria or Elena.”
“Maybe not now, but who knows,” I shrugged, tears streaming down my cheeks. “Maybe their evilness is in my DNA, lying dormant and waiting to come to life. Maybe I’m just inherently messed up, like they were. I know it might not make sense, but I need you to understand how scared I am.”
“Sofiya, I know you in ways you don’t even fucking realize. You’re nothing like them.”
“Igor died because of me,” I managed to say, my voice catching as tears welled up. I squeezed my eyes shut, feeling the unbearable weight of my words hanging between us. “He was like a father to you, and he was shot because of me, because of my existence.” I wrapped my arms around myself, overcome with guilt. “You should hate me, or at least want to kill me for what happened.”
A few seconds passed, and the honking of a few cars down the street cleared the fog of my emotions.
“It wasn’t your fault,” he whispered.
I shook my head.
Deep down, we both know it’s the truth.
