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“He saved my life,” I argued.
“He tied you to a fucking chair and let Yuri hit you!” he shouted, his face mottled with rage. But under all that, there was a spark of something else.
Fear.
I pressed my hand to his cheek, hoping I could soothe him. Slowly, his jaw unclenched and his fingers slowed as his thumb touched my clit, circling slowly and drawing out my pleasure.
“I never meant to scare you. It wasn’t in the plans, but we didn’t have a choice.” As his body tightened, I rushed on. “I swear to you, if I had any other options, I would have taken them. But Yuri was there just as Ivan pulled me out of that building. It was either go along with Ivan’s plans or let Yuri shoot me. I swear, I had nothing to do with when Cash decided to fill you in on the details. I didn’t see any of them until FNG snuck over to me and fitted me with a fake hand.”
If I was supposed to be soothing him, I was failing miserably. At the mention of the fake hand, his body stiffened again.
“That was fucking stupid. He might have realized it was all fake and cut off your other hand in a fit of rage.”
“But he didn’t,” I reassured him. “It could have all gone wrong and I might be dead, but the plan worked.”
He nodded slightly, his hand sliding up my belly and over my breast until he skimmed my neck. “Yes, it might have all gone wrong.” His grip suddenly tightened around my neck. “And then you fucking ran from me.”
In a flash, I was spun around and thrust up against the wall. He yanked my arm behind me and held me in place as he kicked my legs apart with his foot. I slid on the slick floor, nearly falling if he hadn’t been holding me up.
“Nicholas—”
A hard smack landed on my ass and I jerked, trying to get away from him. “What the fuck were you thinking?”
“I was thinking I was trying to avoid this!”
He slammed his hand down on my ass again and I choked out a scream. He was unrelenting in his power and need to punish me. I squirmed in his hold, trying to get out of his arms, but he just held me tighter, refusing to let me go. My skin burned as the hot water rushed over it, scalding the very place he was abusing. I cried out his name, begged him to stop, but he was too angry with me.
Finally, as tears streamed down my face, he released me, stepping away. As I turned around, he stared at my body one last time before jerking the shower curtain back and stepping out. The door closed seconds later and I was left alone in the shower. Sinking to the floor, I took a deep breath and swiped at the tears on my face.
I wasn’t hurt. I was angry at myself. I had hurt him, and I knew now it was going to take a lot more than an apology to make up for what he just went through. I shut off the water and wrapped a towel around my body, prepared to plead with him to forgive me if that’s what it took. But when I stepped into the room, he was gone.
30
NICHOLAS
I signaled the bartender for another round. After I smacked the hell out of Raven’s ass, I had to get out of there. I was never brutal with anyone before. I may have wanted to kill my ex-wife, but I never did it. But Raven…she made me do things I never imagined out of pure jealousy and rage.
And fear.
She got that one right. When I saw her tied to that chair, I knew in my soul I would never see her again. And there was nothing I could do about it. So, to find out the whole thing was a sham—a joke that felt like it was being played on me as some punishment for falling for the woman…I didn’t know how to handle that.
The bartender slid the glass in front of me, immediately turning to another patron. I was glad that he wasn’t trying to get me to spill my guts to him. The last thing I wanted was someone trying to make me feel better.
“Coke on the rocks.”
I rolled my eyes as Cash took a seat beside me. I didn’t need to turn to know it was him. I recognized his voice instantly.
“So, you came here to drink away your cares instead of spending the night with your woman.”
I brought the glass to my lips and took a healthy swallow.
“You know, it wasn’t her fault.”
I sighed. I really didn’t want to talk to him.
“She didn’t go along with the plan for any reason other than she did what she had to do.”
I picked up the glass and downed the rest of it. Turning to him, I kept my voice low and even. The last thing I wanted was to draw attention to myself. “Let’s get one thing clear right now. My relationship with Raven is none of your business.”
