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Someone knocked on the door, and I looked up to the last person I thought I’d see right now.
Of course, I figured it made sense. It had been a long time this woman had had some kind of preternatural sense around me.
“You’re looking well,” Anya said, inviting herself into my office.
“Hm.” I set my phone aside, face-down. She didn’t need to know I was looking at a picture of London at a time like this, like some kind of lovesick fool. “Somehow I suspect you’ve seen me doing better.”
“Where is she?” She sat in the armchair opposite me, crossing her legs and leaning back.
“You certainly make yourself at home quickly. Did I even invite you?”
“Where is she?”
I sighed, standing up, picking up my coffee as I leaned against the window. Mostly empty. Needed another one, and quickly. London would probably have already been on it… ever the most attentive person I’d ever met.
Was I ever going to stop thinking of London every second I lived?
“Miami, for now,” I said, gripping the cup a little tighter. “Sure she won’t stick around once all this is done. She, uh… never liked the rain.”
“A time like this, and you still push her away?”
I finished off the coffee, letting my arm drop, holding the empty cup by my side as I rested my head against the window. “I didn’t… want her to see me like this,” I sighed.
Behind me, Anya snorted. “I guess color me shocked. The woman who dresses up as somebody else to hide her real feelings, hiding her feelings again.”
I tossed the empty cup into the trash can, dropping back into my chair, suddenly bone-deep exhausted. I’d been hoping to push the adrenaline out to the end of the day and then let the weight of it all catch up with me, but first I’d let myself wander back to thoughts of London when I had a thousand things that needed doing, and then Anya walked in. I needed to get onto the discussion with Kerry and Sam soon, but… Christ, the idea was overwhelming right now.
“Anya… what am I supposed to do?”
She pursed her lips. “You do the same thing I always told you to. I’m not wishy-washy.”
I winced. “So… protect my career. The things I’ve built. And don’t throw them away for love.”
She pulled a sour expression. “That’s what you took away from that? I swear, you’re dense. I’d never talked to you about your career, woman, I’d talked to you about your dreams. About looking for what you really want. And the other thing I always told you was that Kyle is unbearable.”
“Kevin.”
“So throwing away the things you really want to go back to Kyle hardly serves the purpose, does it?”
I sighed, pinching my brow. “And for the entire company of people who are counting on me to keep up this brand, their livelihoods?”
“Just because that man is threatening them on your behalf doesn’t mean it’s your fault what happens to them.” She stood up, slowly, walking to the window, standing just next to my chair, looking at me from the corner of her eye. “Besides, these things always end up so much less scary and destructive in practice than in reality, don’t they? How long did you talk yourself out of leaving that man, telling yourself it would be devastating, unbearable?”
I looked back down at my phone. “If this is the way things have turned out, maybe I was right.”
“Ah, you’re so cynical. Sure, something terrible’s come up. But you also fell in love, saw the world, met yourself as you really are. And something terrible would have happened sooner or later staying behind and avoiding the hard decision, too. And besides—you already know this would only buy you time anyway.”
Frustrated me how she was always smarter than me. I squeezed my hands tight on the desk surface. “I… I know. He’s probably still going to get the brand dissolved if I go back, too, just… slower. But I can help people out of it, get everybody to go…”
“These things happen, Cameron. You’re not the only business owner out there who’d lose everything even just this week. It’s the constant flow of life. But again… I think you’ll find yourself surprised by how well things work out when you lean into it.” She put her hands up. “But don’t mind me. I’ve just been right about everything before, doesn’t mean I’ll be right about this.”
“Coin can still come up on the other side,” I murmured, and she gave me a look.
“What’s that?”
“Nothing. Just thinking of… something.”
She squinted. “Your girlfriend?”
