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“I mean, I’d be one to agree…” She looked, just for a second, but long enough for it to be unmistakable what she was doing, at my chest. I laughed, my face burning.
“Cameron!”
“What?” She put her hands up, doing a bad job fighting back her smile.
God, though, if I didn’t want to let her see all she liked.
The food was mouthwateringly good, tender seafood bursting with flavor, but more than that, just seeing the way Cameron enjoyed it… if she hadn’t admitted she hadn’t gone out for food much lately, her face now would have been a giveaway. I stared, maybe a bit too much, just taking her in—the way she thrilled in these small pleasures, experiencing them like it was the whole world.
It was stunning.
We wound down with carajillos after the meal, and once the drinks were running low and our conversation ran to a natural lull, we both found ourselves with our eyes wandering to the horizon, the glimmering lights of Miami Beach like artificial stars on the water.
“Thank you,” Cameron said, softly, pulling me out of my thoughts. I glanced back over at her, but she wasn’t looking at me, holding her glass to her lips and not drinking from it, just staring out over the water. “For tonight,” she said. “It’s… I’ve needed something like this.”
I watched her, my throat tight, for an anxious, heart-pounding second before I dared to put words together. “My pleasure. Thank you for coming with me. I’ve loved this.”
“Haven’t had proper Peruvian in some time,” she said, a glimmer coming into her eyes. “You know how to make a girl happy.”
“It’s good, right? It’s one of my favorites.”
“Might be mine too now,” she said, and that sweet, delicate smile that danced over her lips was to die for. I’d never known what people described—that magnetism towards a person, the aching urge to kiss them, how they could draw you in past your own resolve with just a look—but Cameron made it all crystal clear.
“So,” I said, drawing the word out. “Is now when you’re going to ask me on another date?”
She pursed her lips, looking back out over the water. My immediate urge was to move in, softening the pain point, take the pressure off and let the idea sit in her mind and come back for a second try—but it stank of artificiality right now.
Right now, my heart just wanted to wait and see what she said. And after a second, she sighed, hanging her head.
“Maybe there is some bad luck at play,” she said, her voice airy, distant. “Of all the times for you to show up in my life, stealing my heart…”
“Maybe so.” I paused. “But… lately I’ve been thinking luck is what you make of it.”
“Have you?” She glanced back at me, a smile dancing over her lips. “Moving on past the superstitions, then?”
“Trying.” I shifted back in my seat, crossing my legs, putting my arms out. “For example, maybe my timing is perfect.”
“Oh, is it, now?” Her smile widened.
“Why not? If I hadn’t come along right now, maybe you’d have done something you’d regret.”
Her smile faltered, and she turned back to the water. After the silence stretched on too long, I got a tension in my gut like my insides were coiling, and I relaxed my pose, leaning forwards.
“Sorry. Not trying to make light of your situation.”
“If you hadn’t come along, maybe this wouldn’t have happened,” she said, her voice distant—like she was whispering to someone across the water. “He wouldn’t have done this. I could still be living like before.”
I measured my breaths carefully, just watching her for the longest time, pushing down the heavy feeling in my head, before I heard myself speak—softly, gently. “There’s a but there.”
“Oh, is there?” Her tone lightened, but she still wouldn’t look at me.
“I know the ways you talk. I may have watched a couple of your interviews, too…” I looked away. “Just while I was missing you.”
She sighed, a sad smile on her lips as she took a sip of her cocktail. “I speak differently in an interview than I do here.”
“I’m aware of that, too. Made me feel special.”
She laughed. And then it went away, as she looked down into her drink. “So I suppose there is a but there.”
