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“I don’t think he knew, either.”
She softened, turning slowly back to the window. “Huh… I guess maybe when you put it like that.”
“You two both had plenty of money, thanks to your success. He wasn’t being generous and humble. He was just scared of it—scared of you. And fear—I think that does change a person.”
She slumped forwards, hanging her head. “Am I?” she said, softly. “Scared of this. Changing. I know I’ve changed since then. Has it changed me the same way?”
I swallowed hard, and I watched her—quietly, carefully, studying her in profile for the longest time. Outside the window, streaks of lightning cut their way across a cloud-drenched sky, rain rippling furiously over the pool surface.
Finally, I spoke softly. “Do you like the person you are now?”
She shrugged, staring straight ahead, out the window. “Never really thought about that.”
“So… think about it.”
She chewed her lip.
“What kinds of things do you think about yourself? When it’s just you and your mind.”
Slowly, Cameron dropped her gaze to the floor. And slowly, she stood up, turning to me with a look of finality.
“I don’t think what we’re doing is safe, London.”
My stomach lurched. I rose with her, my heart in my mouth. “How do you mean?”
She folded her arms, looking out the window. “You’re the only person around me to ask me things like that. I like it too much. I like you too much. At this rate, I’ll want to start calling them dates. And then it’s trouble for everyone.”
God, but if I didn’t want that. It almost bowled me over with the intensity of the feeling—how raw the desire was, flying in the face of everything I was supposed to be feeling. I wanted to be her trouble. Wanted her to be mine. Wanted to damn what María would say, what her husband would say, fly the image of me on her arm for all the world and see what the gossip rags would run about it.
But she was right. With her husband wedging his way into things, it wasn’t smart for either of us right now. Cameron Mercier was a married woman.
Turned out I was bad luck for her, too.
“So…” I turned to the window with her, pushing down the roiling in my stomach. “No more clandestine rendezvous.”
She sighed, hard. “We’re both being irresponsible. And we’ve known that from the beginning.”
“Not that I haven’t enjoyed it, but… this was definitely your idea.”
She gave me a dry smirk. “And yours was to hit on my assistant, so, who’s really the angel?”
I put a hand up. “Hey. Not saying I didn’t make irresponsible decisions. Just that this irresponsible decision was you.”
She closed her eyes, smiling distantly, turning back to the window. “I’ll have you know I’ve… enjoyed our time together very much.”
I swallowed the sick feeling in my throat. “Me too. And… for what it’s worth…”
I trailed off, suddenly awkward. She cracked her eyelids, giving me a look. “Don’t leave a girl in suspense,” she said. I looked away.
“For what it’s worth, I’d still make the bad decision.”
“London.” She sighed, a hand to her forehead. “For Christ’s sake. Don’t tempt me.”
“Sorry.”
“You are not.”
“Admittedly—no.”
