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And she couldn’t bring herself to tell Rafael. Keeping Libby hidden was as much for her daughter’s protection as her own. Even if he were to find out at this late stage, Humbolt could cause a lot of damage to Libby’s life. To Patty’s. He would do his best to ruin Patty’s career, possibly try to have her arrested.
What would that do to Libby? To all of them?
No. Sasha couldn’t expose them to any of that. She would hold on to her secret until she was in her grave or Humbolt was in his.
In the meantime, she would have a baby with Rafael. This time she would keep her baby and everything would be perfect and wonderful.
She finally fell asleep, waking late and finding Rafael on deck, already finished with his breakfast and nursing his second cup of coffee.
“I left you sleeping, thinking you needed it. You were restless last night.” He searched her gaze.
“Too much champagne,” she said with a breezy shrug. “Good thing I got that out of my system since I won’t be allowed alcohol if we’re trying for a baby.”
“Really?” A light came into his gaze that made her heart flip over. “You want to?”
“I do.” Her insides were vibrating as she let him draw her from her chair into his lap, never dreaming in that moment that try would become such a loaded, painful word.
CHAPTER FOUR
Fourteen months later...
AFTER MONTHS OF CAJOLING, Rafael had finally got Gio Casella onto his yacht.
Gio was his contemporary in age, but old, old money from Genoa, Italy. He ran a sprawling, well-established global conglomerate, Casella Corp. Hammering out a deal with him would go a long way to finally proving Rafael had as much right to ply international shipping waters as anyone else.
Gio was not, however, interested in the female company Alexandra had arranged for him.
Jacinda was the niece of someone moderately important from somewhere vaguely notable. Alexandra knew her from her boarding school days. Jacinda was beautiful and well-mannered, but a little too blatant in her attempt to earn Gio’s favor. She had taken off her top as she entered the pool, and her breasts were definitely lovely, but she was practically rubbing them all over Gio, which Rafael suspected from Gio’s indifference was actually more irritating than tantalizing.
Perhaps a swim after lunch had been a bad idea. Rafael should have suggested they get back to business, but Alexandra had been tasked with entertaining the rest of their guests all morning. He’d brought Gio out to the lido deck hoping a relaxing drink would keep everyone sociable and happy.
Alexandra had her own top off, all the women did, but even though she was lying on a lounger, she didn’t seem to be relaxed. She’d been off her game when she assembled this particular crowd, misjudging Gio’s bachelor status as a man looking for a good time. Rafael couldn’t take her to task for it. She had been going through a lot. It was distracting her and causing fissures in their relationship.
A week ago, as they’d been preparing for this trip, she’d got her period. Again.
“Perhaps we should consider other options,” he’d said when she had announced that with her usual discussion over tone.
“We’re running out of options, aren’t we?” she’d snapped.
That had been the third round of IVF so she wasn’t wrong.
“Look, I know you’re disappointed, but—” he began.
“Don’t tell me what I feel.” Her mood went from ice to explosive in a millisecond, leaving her shaking and teary as she glared at him. “Don’t tell me this is okay. This is something my body should be able to do, Rafael.”
“I want to quit trying while we reassess,” he said firmly, making that decision for both of them. “We could both use a break from the pressure.”
“Oh, could you? Do you need a break from filling a cup once in a while?” she asked, voice pitched to the height of resentment.
He clenched his teeth against engaging. Whatever frustration he was suffering, she was going through worse. He knew that. Injections and procedures and waiting, only to find it hadn’t worked.
But he stuck by his decision. When they came aboard, he brought her a glass of wine, which she accepted with an air of resignation.
Since then, she had been drinking freely, not getting sloppy, but acting more the life of the party, the way she had in their early days. She trotted out salacious stories from “before my husband tamed me,” and flirted outrageously with him, leaning to show him her cleavage and gripping the inside of his thigh over dinner.
Rafael didn’t mind. Whenever she teased him in front of an audience, she always came through behind doors. He dismissed it as her blowing off steam from their latest disappointment, but he realized her infertility was affecting her far more deeply than she was letting on.
He hated that she took her body’s inability to get pregnant as a personal failure. It was bad luck and he was genuinely saddened by it, but he couldn’t say so. Anytime he tried to talk about it, she shut things down with the swiftness of a guillotine blade.
