AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Doesn’t mean I didn’t have a boyfriend.”
“Well, what made him worth it? How did you know?”
Davey sighs. “TJ, Carter and I have a complicated history. We don’t have a love at first sight, Hallmark movie love story.”
“Oh.”
I’ve treaded into some personal territory, and I know it’s none of my business. It’s not even that I care so much about their history. Maybe I just want him to tell me I will feel that someday, too.
“I’ve never loved anyone before,” I blurt out, my eyes on Madison, unwilling to make that admission while meeting Davey’s eyes. “I used to be proud of that. Thought it was some badge of honor.”
“And lately?”
“Lately…I just feel…well, I don’t feel anything. Empty, numb, alone.”
We sit in silence for a moment. Madison jumps onto the couch and lays out, her head in my lap, long legs stretched to the other end of the couch. Her eyes gazing up at me. Davey and I smile at her.
“Maybe I need a dog.” I stroke her fur and return my attention to Davey. “Is it so wrong that I want to see what it’s like to be with a man?”
“No, just make your intentions clear to whoever you end up with. Just because you find Nandy attractive doesn’t mean you are gay, TJ. And not every gay man wants to be some straight guy’s plaything, no matter how hot he is.”
I pause for a moment, my attention split between Davey and Madison when his words register. “You think I’m hot, Davis?”
“Get out of my office, Trevor.”
Getting Nandy’s number may have been my original plan. But suddenly I have a better idea. Looking at my watch, I stroll out of the main Grizzlies practice arena and across the street to Asgard—one of the soon to be three more rinks for training and local or regional games. College teams, the US national team and every kid in the region will eventually train and play all their games here.
I hear the whistles and skates scraping the ice as soon as I step through the double doors from the concourse to the arena.
Devyn is on the ice with Crystal next to her—one of her proteges who is now on the US National team and by her side coaching the next throng of young girls sure to be Olympians and professionals. Levi and Brady orchestrated the construction of this facility for her. Supposedly, Levi got pissed at our former head coach and bought the facility, so he has control over how it is used. Carter, who is an amazing architect, turned Levi’s vision into a major hockey compound that has become the envy of every team in the country, from kids to pros.
I make my way down to the bench and step behind it.
“To what do we owe this honor?” Devyn quips.
I raise my eyebrows. “I need a favor.”
“Of course you do…what do I get for it?”
I smirk at her. Since she is very married to a pair of men, I’m guessing what she will want is hockey related. “Me? On the ice with your girls?”
“Good answer.” She rests her chin on her stick and waits for my request.
“I need concert tickets, backstage, VIP tickets. Really, just one for me.”
She raises her head, confused and very amused. Devyn knows everyone from her PR days, so if anyone can make this happen, she can.
“Can you do that for me?”
“Probably. Text me the details,” she smiles and skates away.
Chapter six
The crowd is restless tonight
The Chicago crowd always is. They fire me up, make me feel like a rock star, give me the boost I need to finish the tour. That’s why I usually end here, at home, or as close to it as I can. But it isn’t the end this time. Seems it’s never the end.
I’m exhausted. It gets harder every time to find that renewed energy. To feel that recharge. Lately when I make a pass through Chicago, I just want to stay. I want to stay home. I have another two weeks to go after this. Six more stops and then a break. Six fucking stops. I feel so drained. So empty. My reasons for doing this drift farther and farther from view lately. Because I love it. Because I love music and seeing a black foreign-born man on stage with a violin, it shows other kids who look like me, who sound like me, they can do it too.
