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We ride in silence and I’m glad for it. I like that Nevada doesn’t need to fill the silence with words. Sometimes I just need to think.
It isn’t like I really thought the guy would come outright and admit to hearing anything about the trafficking rumors, but to just completely shut us down like that? It definitely doesn’t add up.
Suddenly, Nevada’s Bluetooth pops up and I stare at it.
No Caller ID
Answer me you asshole
Nevada notices and quickly taps the message off but I’m already staring at him. “Who was that?”
He shakes his head. “I’ve no idea. This weird number keeps trying to phone me and when I don’t answer, they hang up.”
Instantly I’m suspicious. Realistically, I don’t know this man from Adam. He could be anyone. Before my mind starts to get away from me, I say, “An angry ex?”
“Doubt it. I never had a steady girlfriend.”
“I’ll reword that then, a pissed off one-night stand?”
He turns the corner, his hands gripping the wheel tightly. “Maybe, but I haven’t had sex with anyone since I saw you that night at the Whiskey Straight.”
He did say that, and I wasn’t sure I believed him at the time. I thought he was just being a sociopath and trying to impress me. I don’t think he tells lies. I mean, if he does, he’s really good at it. My bullshit radar is high, and while I know he’s many things, a liar doesn’t appear to be one of them.
“Uh, huh.”
I feel his eyes on me. “I’m tellin’ the truth. Had blue balls for months, which is why I can’t wait to fuck you balls deep as soon as we get back to the motel.”
I clench my thighs, but I show no emotion on my face. “Nevada, we’re here to do something important, not just fuck ourselves to death.”
“You think that’s what we’re doin’?” He chuckles. “Oh, carrot cake, I haven’t even begun to show you the pleasure I can inflict on your body. Like I said,, there’s no reason why we can’t enjoy each other while we do this. No strings attached.”
Instantly, I feel moisture between my legs. This man gets me so slick and ready for it so much that I can’t fight it. I won’t fight it. Even the goddamn ridiculous names he keeps coming up with. And what if I want strings attached? Wait. No. I don’t want any strings attached. That’s insanity. Just because of what he did to me this morning against the door, which has ultimately led me to a newfound and unhealthy craving for his dick, doesn’t mean that I want it to be a permanent thing. But what if it was?
I really can’t allow those indulgent thoughts. The reality is, there are more important things going on than us rolling around together between the sheets, even if he does make me forget. I should get my stuff when I go back and get another room. Staying with him is only encouraging something that isn’t mine to give. My heart isn’t up for grabs and I’m a fool for even thinking it. Nevada will tire of me eventually, especially when some pretty little thing who’s younger, prettier and way more fun catches his eye. Women notice him everywhere. I didn’t miss the glances he got at the diner this afternoon, or the way he got his upgrade from the old woman at the reception desk of the motel. Women of any age are affected by him because he has charisma and charm, and the good looks and pretty eyes to go with it. He’s like this with everyone.
You’re not special. In fact, I’m stupid for even thinking there is such a thing. He’s only twenty-seven, and while I’m not usually hung up on age, I know men in biker clubs have their way with any and all women that come their way. This is a faze for him, and as long as we’re using each other, then nobody gets hurt.
When he slides his hand into mine my heart hammers rapidly in my chest as I look down at it.
He must notice my hesitation to curl my fingers around his. “You overthinkin’ again?”
I shake my head, avoiding his gaze. “Nevada, we’re not boyfriend and girlfriend. This feels…”
“What?”
“Wrong.”
“Wrong?” At least he sounds a little affronted.
“I mean, we’re not a thing. So holding hands is too… intimate.”
“We are a thing.”The words leave his mouth and they sound venomous.
“We’re fucking.”
“I only fucked you once with my dick, so that’s not exactly true. And while you’re up there on your high-horse, I might remind you that you didn’t seem to mind what I was doin’ to you with my dick and you beggin’ me for more.”
“That’s exactly it. More dick, not the… other stuff…” I feel like a complete bitch saying it and yet again, his eyes are on mine. My tone lowers. “It’s not you. It really is me. I’ve never… I’ve never really had anyone that wanted more from me…”
