Page 260 of Born of Blood and Ash

My throat tight, I opened my eyes and realized I wasgripping his arm and once more staring at the open balcony doors, but it wasfrom a much lower position, and I could feel Ash’s heart pounding against myarm. It took a moment to realize that not only had Ash turned me in his armswithout me realizing it and fixed the nightgown so I was covered, he’d also satus on the couch.

Good gods. How long had I been freaking out? My heart turnedover heavily. It had felt like only seconds, but clearly, it had been longerthan that because I…I was in his lap, my feet dangling a few inches above thefloor, and his hand was in my hair. Then I smelled—

“Lilacs,” I rasped, my body shaking. “I smell stale lilacs.”

CHAPTERTHIRTY-EIGHT

Terror seized me in one breath, and shamescalded me in the other. My muscles locked up and then moved all at once. I hadno control over them—over myself. I sprang from Ash’s lap so fast I nearly lostmy balance as I bumped into the table, knocking over a glass.

“Sera?” Ash said my name quietly, but there was no mistakingthe heavy threads of concern in his voice.

Calm down. I needed to calm down. I’m notthere. I’m being foolish. I’m not there.

Managing to take a deep enough breath, I closed my eyes andfocused on breathing. “I’m okay.” I was. “I’m fine.”

Ash didn’t respond, and the silence drove my eyes open.

He was on the edge of the couch, frozen as if he had been inthe process of standing. His right hand was on the arm, his knuckles bleachedwhite.

My chest rose and fell with a ragged breath, and I could’vesworn his chest did the same.

“You’re okay?” he said, the skin of his chest thinning.

I nodded, pressing my shaking hands to my hips.

His throat worked on a swallow. “What just happened?”

“Nothing.” I took another step back and turned halfway tothe table, staring at the overturned glass. “You didn’t hurt me or anything—”

“I know I didn’t hurt you.” Ash had gone completely still.“I also know that wasn’t nothing.”

I stared harder at the glass.

“You smelled lilacs. Stale lilacs,” he continued, his voicelow. “That is what death—true death—smells like.”

The temperature around me plummeted, and I swung my headback to him.

“That is what Kolis smells like.”

A shudder went through me, and I forced myself to move. Istarted toward the table. “Yeah, he does.”

His body trembled, too. “Sera…”

My skin stretched tight as I reached for the fallen glass.“What?”

“Talk to me,” he said. “Please.”

I swallowed, my heart squeezing. My hand was still shakingas I righted the glass. “About what?”

“About what you’re feeling right now.”

“I’m feeling kind of tired right now,” I answered, forcing ayawn. “Shouldn’t we be sleeping?”

“Sera.”

Feeling backed into a corner, I reacted like any cagedanimal. “What?” I snapped. “What do you want me to say? I freaked outfor a minute. It’s no big deal.”

“I didn’t say it was.”