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“What about your job? You’ll be gone for hours at a time. If I can’t even get to the bathroom by myself…”
“We’ll figure it out, Mom. Just maybe not right this second.”
She nods, her eyes closing again as exhaustion takes over. I stay by her side for a moment, watching the readout on her heart monitor. I don’t want to be here. I wish this could just be a regular night where I curl into my bed and watch TV until I fall asleep. But it’s not. My mom needs me, and this is where I’ll be until she’s discharged.
I glance over at the small couch in the corner of the room. It doesn’t look comfortable, but it’s better than nothing. After clicking off the bedside lamp, I fluff the pillow and put it on one side, glancing at the door to the room, sure that a nurse will rush in with something forgotten. But the hall is mostly quiet.
I settle onto the couch, pulling the thin blanket over me. My mind races with worry about my mom’s future and how I’m going to manage everything, especially if I’m not able to return to my job anytime soon.
Sometime after eight a.m., the doctor arrives with a grim face. I can tell by the sympathy in his eyes that something is wrong. I wonder what could possibly be worse than what’s going on right now, but I stand by my mother’s side and rest a hand on her shoulder, so she doesn’t feel alone.
"We’ve discovered that your kidneys aren’t functioning as well as they should be.” He shuffles some papers and shakes his head again.
I don’t like the mournful look on his face. I took science class as a kid, but that doesn’t mean I remember exactly what every part of the body is used for. Kidneys have something to do with making urine, but I don’t know much else.
“This could be causing some of the pain you’ve been experiencing. We’re going to need to keep you here for a few more days to monitor your condition and make sure you’re stable. We’re also going to get you on an antibiotic that will kick out the infection in your kidneys and keep them functioning as well as they can."
I nod, feeling the weight of the situation pressing down on me. "Thank you."
“I… I have a question,” my mom says, not willing to just take the news like that. As she lifts her hand like a schoolgirl, she seems so frail. I’ve never noticed that about my mother before. “I’ve only had pain for a couple of days. It’s possible that it’s just a virus, right? It will pass.”
The doctor smiles patiently. “Do you remember the x-ray we performed last night after we set your leg?”
My mother looks confused. “Yesterday was a bit of a blur. Everything happened so quickly. I was in so much pain.”
“I understand. Look, I’ll show you on here.” The doctor leans forward and shows my mother some pictures of her kidneys. He explains how the dark spots could be an infection or could be blood filled cysts, but it’s difficult to tell without an MRI.
I tell myself it’s good that someone has noticed this. If there’s an infection, it could spread. It could get worse. But at the same time, I don’t know if I have the strength to be emotionally there for my mother. I need a quick walk around the halls.
After my walk and finding the cafeteria where the food isn’t too bad, I feel better and more able to face my mother. I sit beside her bed, and we talk for a couple of hours about what the doctor said and what it means for us. We try to figure out what life will look like when she’s released from the hospital.
Sometime after my mother begins taking an afternoon nap, I feel my phone vibrate in my pocket and pull it out to see Jay’s name on the screen. My stomach churns with anxiety.
I should have already been at The Rusty Oak for my shift today, but I’ve completely forgotten about anything outside of the hospital walls.
I step into the hall so I don’t disturb my mother’s rest.
Taking a deep breath, I answer the call. "Hello?"
"Violet, where the hell are you?" Jay’s voice is sharp. "You were supposed to be here over an hour ago. You can’t just skip your shift without telling anyone."
Guilty, I wince, trying to think of how I can excuse myself without giving details of my mother’s situation.
CHAPTER 19
JAY
Violet hasn’t been answering her phone.
It’s the classic no-show treatment, I’ve seen it a hundred times; an employee doesn’t feel like showing up to work, but doesn’t want to own up to the fact, so they evade me instead.
Harold’s words from last night flash through my mind. He talked about communicating emotions, but I can’t just say, “Violet, I’m frustrated that you’re not here because you were supposed to be here and we’re really busy,” now, can I?
Finally, after the third call, she picks up.
“I’m sorry,” Violet says. She sounds tired, and I can practically hear her groping around for some sort of excuse. “I… forgot.”
“What? You forgot? How is that possible?” I lower my tone. Yelling doesn’t help the situation at all, but it still feels like a natural response when I’m mad. I take a deep breath and exhale, glancing around the chilly alley out back where I decided to make this call. “Can you still come in? We’re packed right now.”
