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Yet despite everything she’s done, everything she is, I won’t hate her. Still want to hug her. Still have the urge to protect and defend her.
She’s my firstborn. My only child. She taught me what it means to be a father.
She’s also my worst nightmare.
Which is why I don’t open my arms up for her, even though it kills me.
Her steps falter. “What’s wrong?”
Three feet separate us. The distance is too much. Too fucking little.
I dip my chin, leveling her with a meaningful glare. “We agreed we’d quit this pretend game, didn’t we?”
“Ugh, fine, whatever.” It takes one sentence to transform her smile into a frown. She places her hands on her hips, her eyebrow arching. “So I used a little violence to get us here. What’s the big deal? Can’t you hug your only daughter anymore?”
Psychiatry chose me, not the other way around. And it’s at this moment that I understand why. Without the years of experience, I would’ve lost it. Would’ve screamed my head off at Rylan. Might’ve even strangled her.
I don’t.
With my voice low and gravelly, I answer her demented question, “We’ll hug later. Once we’ve talked this through.”
She closes her eyes, pulling her lips in. Rylan sucks in a long, calming breath through her nose. When her eyes open, she’s still very much pissed off. I do give her props for trying.
Until she shifts her body to the right to look behind me.
“She’s not here,” I lie.
“Chickenshit bitch. Just like Milo,” Rylan mutters under her breath.
“I heard that.”
“He promised me he’d do anything to get you two back.” She seethes as if I said nothing, and I let her have at it. Verbally. “Loser.”
Sometimes venting helps calm a person down. She and I are alike. But her threats on Leighton have me treading a fine line.
It won’t be long before I snap. Before the protective beast has had enough.
Nothing good will come out of it.
Which is why I give her the stage. I hope ranting will calm her down.
“Apparently, anything doesn’t include kidnapping. Anything doesn’t include violence.” Her voice has a lilt to it, rising and falling maniacally. “I finally saw him for what he was. Weak as fuck. I couldn’t count on him to kill Leigh when the time came. I guess I found my hard limit, ya know? If a man isn’t into kidnapping and torture, then I don’t want him. I’ll turn him into a nice fertilizer once I’m back home.”
Milo is dead.
Milo is the least of my concerns at the moment.
Leighton is right there at the top.
Pressure winds in each and every muscle in my hands. My fingers curl, and I flex them to stop myself from launching forward.
“This will be the first and last time I’ll allow you to talk like this, Rylan. We’re having an adult conversation. You watch your mouth when you mention Leighton.”
Rylan’s tongue darts out, licking her upper lip. “Or else?”
Or else I’ll fucking strangle you. You won’t die, but it’ll be close. Enough to neutralize you and appease the monster inside me.
No. I won’t strangle her. I’ve never hit her, and I’m not about to start now.
