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My soul cracks, the agony rushes out of me in the form of tears. Of sobs.
“Whatever you do, it’ll hurt less. So, go on,” I beg through the tears. “Have at it. I fucking want you to.”
They exchange a serious look. Killian returns to study me first. “We’ll get you through it, beautiful girl.”
“Begonias, Amara. Remember begonias,” Carter reminds me of my safeword. “Say it for us. Let us see you remember.”
“Begonias,” I whisper.
The world stills for the whole of a second before Carter smacks my ass. The blow is so hard that he sends me to Killian. I’m howling in pain.
The best kind of pain.
Killian doesn’t give me pause. Doesn’t soften the next blow, either.
They take turns on my ass. Burning me. Marking me. Delivering pain that’s too much. That isn’t enough.
They continue saying nothing for what seems like hours. Grunting with effort. Stopping every few minutes to check if I’m about to say my safeword.
I never do.
I never will.
I need this.
They go on until the skin on my ass feels raw and wounded.
Until my heart bursts open. More tears come, more furious than ever. A flood soaking through my cheeks and down to the floor.
The physical pain doesn’t bother me. It’s my emotions that rise to the surface, making a mess of everything.
My chest heaves. I hiccup. Sob.
“Beautiful girl.”
“Pet.”
Their voices are grunts. They filter into my ears. Their strong arms, one from each side, hook under my belly. They’re warm. They’re loving. They’re them.
I’m being hauled into one firm chest and one arm releases me.
A hand winds in my hair, angling my face to the side. To meet the beautiful man with gray, stormy eyes. Sweat beads have formed on his forehead. Fire burns from his every pore.
“Amara, I can’t fucking take another second of this.” He yanks my hair harder, his other hand going to my throat. “Tell us right the fuck now what happened, or so help me…”
“They’re selling my shop. I won’t have any place for my flowers. For my plants.” My gaze darts hysterically between him and Killian. “It’ll be months before I find a new place, and they’ll sell the shop by then. I won’t have anywhere to keep my plants. Won’t be able to sell anything. They ruin everything. It hurts, Carter. It hurts so goddamn much.”
Carter pins me to his chest. My hands ball into fists, but I need them. I need to hold onto something. Someone. Killian sees through my crumpled face, grabs both my wrists, and brings my hands to the place where his heart beats.
“They said they wished I’d never been born,” I mumble, leaning my weight on Carter. His lips don’t leave the top of my head. They’re tender. The violence he radiates isn’t. “Fuck, it hurts so fucking bad. Why did you make me talk about them? Why?”
I do, in fact, know why. It’s the same reason I fled from their penthouse and showed my face here. To have them love me. Take care of me. Tell me I’m not alone.
But fuck, the pain. It’s shredding me. Now that I’ve said the words, my grim future is real. So real.
“Her landlords? Why the fuck would they say that?” Killian asks Carter, probably realizing I’m too much of an emotional mess to elaborate.
Carter has kept my landlords’ identity to himself. He hasn’t gossiped.
