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I duck behind a bush as he glances around, and then he pulls the curtains shut again. I look at the map on my phone and back up at the windows, and I pick up more pebbles to try the one next to Patrick’s.
“What are you doing?” a voice behind me says, and I whip around.
“Lincoln!” I gasp.
“Are you trying to sneak in to see my brother?”
Heat rushes to my cheeks. “No!”
“Really?” he asks. “Because if you are, I can get you in. If you aren’t, you’ll probably be arrested.”
My eyes widen. “Fine. Yes. He doesn’t know I’m here, and I don’t want him to get into any trouble. But I need to see him. I need to tell him I love him.”
Lincoln blows out a breath. “Finally.”
“What?”
“You heard me. Finally. I can’t deal with his lack of focus another second, so get in there and do what you have to do to get him on track for tomorrow.”
“He’s not focused?” I say. He’s seemed fine to me during his games.
“He’s in love, and the woman he’s in love with has been holding back. Trust me when I say I know what that’s like. Now do you want to see him, or do you want to stand out here talking to me?”
“Him,” I say immediately. He looks a little offended, and I laugh. “As lovely as it is chatting out here with you.”
“Of course,” he scoffs, and then I follow him through the complex and toward Grayson’s room…which, by the way, is in another building entirely.
“Gray, it’s me,” Lincoln says as he bangs on a door.
The door swings open. “What the fuck do you wa—" Grayson’s jaw drops, and his eyes widen as they land on me. He draws in a sharp breath.
Lincoln steps aside and urges me in. “You have a guest. Don’t stay up too late.”
Grayson’s eyes don’t leave mine as he murmurs, “Thanks.” I step into his room, and the door closes behind him. “What are you doing here?”
“It felt like we left some things unsaid, so I figured I’d swing by so we could talk.”
“Some things unsaid?” he repeats, and we walk into the room. He perches on the edge of his bed, and I sit on the couch right across from him.
I nod. “You go first.”
“I miss you,” he says quietly. “I loved being with you last night. It felt so good and right, and I’m trying so hard to give you space and time, but I just…I miss you.”
Heat pinches behind my eyes as I have the urge to rush into his arms. I don’t—yet. I stay where I am because we need to clear the air before anything else happens. “I miss you, too,” I admit. “Last night was good. Really good. Having you right next to me felt so comfortable. You just fit. And being with my mom and Thomas, it all sort of came crashing down on me—the reality that life is short and unexpected and scary and beautiful.”
His eyes move to mine. “I love you. You were the one who was fighting for me to see that we belong together, and now somehow those roles have reversed. We belong together. I’m fighting for you. I love you. Can’t you see that?” His tone is riddled with frustration that we aren’t together even though we should be, and I’m finally feeling it, too.
We’ve been apart long enough.
“Of course I see it, Grayson. And I love you, too. I never stopped, and I never will.”
He’s silent for a beat, and then he finally asks, “Then why are we apart?”
“Because I’m scared.”
He stands, and he closes the short distance spanning between us. He reaches out, and I set my hands in his as he pulls me up off the couch.
“I don’t know what else to do to prove to you that you don’t have to be scared. I’m not going anywhere. It’s been months since we were together, and I haven’t stopped thinking about you. I haven’t so much as looked at another woman. My chest aches all the time when I think about you and us and how good we were together before I fucked it all up. I’m so sorry, and I will never run scared again. You are it for me—any way I can have you, even if it’s just as a friend like it has been for the last few months. You’re my future. No one else. Before, the thought of kids and marriage scared the hell out of me. But it’s nothing compared to the thought of not having you in my life. I promise you, Ava. I won’t run again. I won’t leave you. I won’t hurt you. Because doing any of those things would kill me.”
