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“In case you forgot, you broke my trust, Mark,” I replied. “That is not something that a relationship gets over easily. Once lost, my trust is lost for a long while unless and until you make good effort faith to try and regain it. This? This is not the kind of gesture you make to regain my trust. Not immediately.”
His face flushed briefly before he plastered on another disingenuous smile.
“Well, then, I guess I’ll just have to wait until you trust me again!”
With that, he shoved the ring box back in his pocket and went over to the front desk where Luke was sitting, attempting to keep himself busy. I walked further away from the desk, mainly so that I could disappear into the kitchen if Mark tried to talk to me again. I ended up positioning myself just inside the dining room doorway.
Mark wouldn’t be able to see me, especially since his back was turned, but Luke could clearly see me.
“As I was saying earlier,” Luke started, “do you need a fishing license, sir?”
“I don’t need a fishing license, as I have not come here to stand in nature all day long.”
I watched Luke for a reaction. This lodge was used mainly as a place for everyone to gather after a long day of fishing, and I knew that it was exactly what he wanted it to be. He was grabbing a key for Mark, and I noticed his fist clench briefly.
Mark was still the same man, it appeared. How could I accept a proposal from someone unwilling to learn from mistakes? Or was it only appearing like that because Mark wanted to make sure Luke understood that there was no chance I would end up with him?
“Well, you’re clearly fishing for a woman, and it’s always a good idea to have permission first,,” Luke said as he turned around, holding the room key. “It currently looks like you might need some better bait.”
In spite of my discomfort, I felt a smile tugging at the corner of my mouth, and I was grateful for Luke’s sense of humor. The large ring must have cost fifty-thousand dollars, and here Mark was, attempting to earn me back with one of them as if I was a fish attracted to a sparkly lure.
Alone in the kitchen with my thoughts, I now realized that this wasn’t going to be as easy as trying to tell Mark that I had moved on. As much as I had enjoyed the kiss from Luke, there was a part of me that was still mourning the wedding I should have had with Mark a couple of weeks ago. I still had the wedding dress, as I had heard it was bad luck to wear a wedding dress secondhand for a wedding that never happened. I hadn’t felt right donating it or selling it.
But even if I got back together with him, I didn’t think I wanted to wear that dress any longer. The memories of picking it out were now tainted by the way I had found out that Mark had been willing to cheat on me so long as he was successful. I wondered if he would have allowed me to do the same thing, and we’d have something of an open relationship. It was certainly not the kind of relationship I wanted.
If I went back to Mark, would I have to make allowances for that?
My stomach dropped hard at the thought.
I decided that it would be best to return to my room, and I made my way up the snow-covered stairs. At the very least, this staircase had a good wooden handrailing. That made me feel better about the fact that it was still easy to slip since the ice had started forming now that it was getting cold enough at night to allow the snow to freeze again after melting all day long.
By the time I arrived at my room, I was ready to call it a night, honestly. Between now having sore muscles from hiking and falling in the snow, the embarrassment of a semi-public second proposal, and the overall stress of knowing that Mark had been able to find me somehow, I wasn’t sure that I was going to be able to do anything. I’d have to do my job, though, which meant I couldn’t go to bed immediately. As much as I may have wanted to, anyway.
Instead, I got in the shower to see if I could soothe my sore muscles a little. I trusted that Luke wouldn’t be sharing my room number with Mark. If I kept my extraneous noise to a minimum, then perhaps he wouldn’t be able to figure out which room was mine by sound alone. Especially since he didn’t technically know that there weren’t other guests in the lodge. Though, the empty parking lot might have made him suspicious.
Once out of the shower, I did feel less tension in my muscles. I got dressed in a simple pair of leggings and a tee shirt that I didn’t mind having to wash constantly so that I could do my job, and then slipped on a pair of sneakers. I wasn’t going to run around the lodge without shoes. Not at all.
I returned to the kitchen to find that Luke had left the lobby. Mark wasn’t there, either, but I had expected that much. He was the guest out of the three of us. I started to cook the chicken strips that had caused the giant fight with Luke that had first sent me to the local bar. It seemed like forever ago that he and I had been at each other’s throats at every meal.
The meal was easy, and I wasn’t sure that I could handle making anything more elaborate.
I heard the dining room doors moving and turned to see who had come in after turning on the heat to let the chicken cook. Rick stood in the doorway.
“I left for two days, and you got yourself proposed to in the lobby?” he said. “What did you say?”
I groaned loudly, slamming the spatula down on the counter so hard that, for a moment, I thought I broke it right in half.
“All right… touchy subject,” Rick said softly. “I didn’t mean to touch a nerve. Usually, when someone proposes, it’s an exciting time. Clearly, that is not the case…”
“What? Didn’t Luke also tell you how the proposal ended?”
Rick shook his head, eyebrows still raised in surprise.
I sighed. “I haven’t yet answered him,” I finally said, though my voice came out more like a growled whisper. “I asked for some time to think it over. The ring he brought…” I scoffed. “It could blind someone from ten feet away, I swear. It’s like he doesn’t even know me. I wonder if he ever did.”
Rick nodded slowly as I picked up the spatula once again. Instead of saying anything more, he left the room. I was thankful for that. As much as I probably needed to talk this out with someone, I was not in the right headspace to do so.
Meanwhile, the chicken continued to cook. It started to make the kitchen smell amazing. I quickly prepared a cheesy potato casserole for the side. The only problem was that, if Mark knew what to look for, he would know immediately that I was cooking chicken strips and cheesy potatoes.
