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Once my face had significantly cooled down, I cracked my room door open a bit. Luke had completely disappeared from the hallway, leaving not a single trace outside my door. I sighed softly. Part of me had been hoping that he would have left me a cookie or something outside my door, though I supposed it was all a lost cause at this point.
As much as I wanted to open up to Luke, my own circumstances made opening to any man right now terrifying. And I clearly wasn’t ready to share more details of my life before coming to Idaho with him.
The only other big question mark in all of this was whether Luke would accept any kind of apology from me, or if I had just robbed myself of the chance to get him to open up to me at all.
I closed the door as I entered my room once more. At this point, anything more than a shower and bed was a lost cause. It was getting later. The more I dwelled on the topic, the more hopeless and helpless I felt.
After a shower, I felt a little better. The water running down my body almost felt like it had been taking my troubles with it. However, they didn’t stay away for long.
When I checked my phone to see if Bailey had responded to my last message earlier, I found that Luke had texted me.
I don’t know if you heard me, but I started the dishwasher.
There was a second text right below it.
I hope you have a good night. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.
The second text warmed my heart a little bit. At least he did care. I wondered if he struggled to share these feelings in person because he had just remained so grumpy with the rest of the world for so long that he had forgotten how to be nice in person. At least with someone that he didn’t know very well.
When I did finally lay down to try and sleep, I found myself unable to fall asleep. Didn’t matter what position I was in, or how many blankets I had over me, or how open the window was. My heart refused to slow down, and my brain refused to let me sleep peacefully.
With a sigh, I decided the best thing to do would be to go down to the kitchen and make something. I took my Bluetooth headphones and my laptop so that I could perhaps watch some videos so that I wasn’t struggling to keep myself entertained while I cooked. Besides, my favorite cake recipe was stored on my laptop.
If nothing else, this would give me something tangible to present to Luke in the morning when I apologized for making things incredibly awkward at dinner tonight. He had asked to do a nice thing together, and I had utterly ruined it.
I booted up my laptop before turning on the main lights in the kitchen. Wherever Luke’s room was, I had a feeling that I wouldn’t be bothering him with the lights here.
That said, it did appear as if the storm was slowing down.
Perhaps Rick would be able to come back, and he could give Luke some advice on how to proceed. Or give me advice on what to do next if this didn’t work.
I shook those thoughts away. I didn’t need them right now. Instead, I put on my headphones, turned on one of my favorite reality shows, and then pulled up the recipe. A homemade vanilla cake with homemade vanilla buttercream frosting was always the best kind of apology cake.
As the night turned into day, I found myself slowly getting more exhausted. However, I couldn’t stop until the cake had been completely finished. Instead of setting it in the freezer overnight, I rigged up a tent of sorts outside with one of the larger towels and let the outside freeze the cake. The storm had completely blown over by then, and I was able to dig out a small spot to let the cake rest.
Like a little icebox. Literally.
The buttercream took a bit of adjusting. My brain was tired, and at first, I over-softened the butter. I had to let it set outside for a few minutes to get it to the correct consistency before whipping it with the powdered sugar.
Once the frosting was done, I pulled my cake from the little ice box and leveled it. Then, I started with a crumb coat of frosting. The weather actually worked to my advantage, and with a towel and a suitable box, I was able to freeze the frosting enough that I could properly frost the cake too.
It wasn’t until I was piping on some details that I realized the sun was starting to come up. I glanced at the clock on my laptop. It was now six in the morning. Luke was probably going to be up soon… and I was already up and in the kitchen. Once the cake was finished – border and all – I stuck it in the fridge.
Then, I started making breakfast. This morning was relatively easy, breakfast wise. I threw together some muffin batter and put that in the oven for about twenty minutes. Vanilla chocolate chip muffins were always a good way to start the day. As much as I wanted pumpkin chocolate chip muffins, I knew we didn’t have pumpkin in the pantry.
It hadn’t been on the list I gave Luke.
As the muffins were coming out of the oven, Luke walked into the kitchen. He froze when he saw me, and for a moment we stood staring at each other.
“I… good morning,” he said. “You’re up early. I didn’t think you’d be in here yet.” He gestured back behind him. “I can leave and…”
I interrupted. “I-I… I wanted to apologize for how things ended last night. It wasn’t your fault I’m still raw about everything that happened with Mark. And it wasn’t right of me to yell at you like that.”
Then, I pulled the cake out of the fridge.
“I made you an apology cake.”
“A… a cake?” He raised an eyebrow, though I could still see that he was half-asleep. Then he looked me up and down. “Wait, have you been up all night?”
